Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheCamoWulf

Search for a member

TheCamoWulf

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 17592
  • Number of comments : 62
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

TheCamoWulf's page activity

Visits<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 6:23pm<b>Defalt</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 8:42pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 9:20pm<b>davered89</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 9:03am<b>krundale</b> - the 04/07/2014 at 4:33am<b>Devon00</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 1:31pm<b>fuck_toast</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 8:48pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 12/12/2013 at 10:58pm<b>Bel2001</b> - the 10/15/2013 at 6:04am<b>StarWolf111</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 3:53am<b>hawkeyepeirce</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 5:44pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 6:47pm<b>baconator666</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 9:15pm<b>UnluckyGenius</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 7:35pm<b>beaubeau1993</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 6:22am<b>turtle_turtle_4</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:42pm<b>ZahnerD</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 8:51am<b>OfCarse</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 1:39am

TheCamoWulf's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of TheCamoWulf's badges

TheCamoWulf's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom scooped the litter box right before I went to work. I brown bagged my lunch this morning. She brown bagged the poop from the litter box. Both were on the counter. Guess which one I brought to work? FML

#969770
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57096) - you deserved it (13051)

On 04/14/2009 at 1:09pm - misc - by chriss (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a customer came in to the Pizza store where I work and complained that the food they had purchased had a strand of black hair in it. After some deliberation, my boss decided to fire me. He is the only staff member there with black hair. I shaved my hair 2 weeks ago. FML

#965793
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78955) - you deserved it (3052)

On 04/14/2009 at 7:18am - work - by hcfan (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was working at a local restaurant when another server's table called me over to ask if I've "ever killed anybody". They informed me I looked like a serial killer. I informed them, of course, that I have never killed anybody. Another customer claimed I scared her child. I was fired. FML

#964026
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68175) - you deserved it (4154)

On 04/14/2009 at 2:13am - work - by Bob (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I bought a coral colored hooded sweatshirt, which my girlfriend told me was "hot". I wore it to a baseball game tonight. When it got cold I put the hood over my head, only to hear everyone behind me laugh. The back of the hood said "Boy crazy". It was a teen girls sweatshirt. FML

#963370
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18520) - you deserved it (65820)

On 04/14/2009 at 1:10am - misc - by khood (man) - United States

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
695 comments

I agree, your life sucks (724017) - you deserved it (56458)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. I was playing with his little sister by grabbing her arms and spinning her around. On one turn, she started screaming in pain. It turns out I dislocated both her shoulders. FML

#956665
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31853) - you deserved it (65160)

On 04/13/2009 at 7:27pm - kids - by grem (woman) - United States

Today, I got 20% tints on my car. As I'm driving home, a cop pulls me over. I didn't want to ruin my new tint by opening my window, so I opened my door as the cop approached. He then pulled out his gun and yelled "GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND!" before I could explain. FML

#952639
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39341) - you deserved it (54085)

On 04/13/2009 at 3:41pm - misc - by italy1986 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, half asleep, I dropped my pill before I could take it. I quickly picked it up and washed it down. Five hours later, I just found my pill on the ground. What did I swallow? FML

#948871
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99290) - you deserved it (23184)

On 04/13/2009 at 12:12pm - misc - by anonymiss (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a first date with a guy that included dinner, pool and pretty good conversation. Around Midnight he yawned and said the beer was making him sleepy, so he took me home. I wasn't tired so I changed and went out with some friends... and saw him on the dance floor. FML

#948690
99 comments

Today, I called my favorite radio station over and over, trying to be the 40th caller to win sold-out concert tickets, each time holding my thumb over the button to quickly hang up and re-dial if busy. I finally got through and they congratulated me being the winning caller! By habit, I hung up. FML

Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could go car shopping. As she pulled away, I remembered the condom wrappers, sex toy packaging, and empty bottle of rum that was in the passenger's seat of my car. I'm twenty. FML

#945659
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13202) - you deserved it (75901)

On 04/13/2009 at 6:46am - intimacy - by jackass (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was at a pool party. My friend's little sister pushed me in the pool. When I got out, I pushed her in. She started screaming, and I started laughing because I thought she was pissed that I pushed her in. That wasn't why she was screaming. She can't swim. Her whole family witnessed it. FML

#937193
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47433) - you deserved it (18456)

On 04/12/2009 at 8:24pm - misc - by imbx (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was going on a plane to Chicago. My passport picture is 6 years old, and back then I was a beautiful model. Now, I gave birth to a child and gained 50 lbs. When I showed my passport to the airport atendents, I got arrested for stealing someones passport. FML



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: