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TheBrochure

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TheBrochure
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1694
  • Number of comments : 231
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About TheBrochure : Thank you for reading the Cool Story, Brochure! Packed with the most undeniably relevant and solicited anecdotes from which the entire family will surely benefit by listening! If you would like to hear (read) the coolest story of the day, simply message me with your desire to do so. Or, if you wish to submit your own cool story, they will be added to the Vault of Cool Stories! Fun Facts: 1. Any party is the perfect forum with which to discuss your story in exhausting detail. 2. You should Definitely consider telling that cool story again some time. 3. I own a horse.

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TheBrochure's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I don't have one. She said "Exactly." FML

#20855163
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45220) - you deserved it (4410)

On 08/26/2013 at 2:22pm - misc - by Miami6and3 - United States (California)

Today, I was at the beach. I'd recently decided to try the "life hack" where you empty out a bottle of lotion and hide small valuables in it, to avoid them being stolen. I'd put the bottle in my bag. Instead of stealing stuff from inside it, though, someone just stole the whole bag. FML

#20853767
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34678) - you deserved it (8946)

On 08/25/2013 at 2:21pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I was walking down the street when a man stole my purse. He then opened the purse, threw up in it, and gave it back. FML

#20852114
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42364) - you deserved it (2990)

On 08/24/2013 at 10:55am - misc - by cassidy_smith12 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was feeling guilty about an argument I had with my mother right before she left to go shopping. When she got back, I ran to give her a hug and tell her I loved her. Unfortunately, in the process, I knocked over and broke her new $200 vase. FML

#20851970
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39272) - you deserved it (7149)

On 08/24/2013 at 6:23am - misc - by horrible daughter (woman) - United States (California)

Today, someone on Facebook posted a really tiny picture that I couldn't read properly, so I responded, "What is this? A picture for ants?!" Turns out it was a commentary about rape, and now I look like an insensitive jackass. FML

#20849199
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36380) - you deserved it (10969)

On 08/22/2013 at 10:48am - misc - by Baustigt - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend and I started fighting. Instead of arguing for herself, she decided to set her puppy on me. Only "Puppy" is the name of her fully-grown police-trained German Shepherd. FML

#20847973
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46595) - you deserved it (5961)

On 08/21/2013 at 2:58pm - animals - by mykhael (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I got a speeding ticket. I couldn't find my insurance card, and the cop was very nice. He said not to worry about it, that I "looked like someone who had insurance." I'm not sure how to take that. FML

#20847276
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35048) - you deserved it (6115)

On 08/21/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Beegee (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got a steering wheel cover to stop my obsessive steering wheel picking. After putting it on, I realized it was crooked, causing me to have OCD fits every time I drive. I can still pick at the steering wheel around the cover. FML

#20845898
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29426) - you deserved it (8900)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:08am - health - by anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I forgot to shut off some pumps before closing the main valves that run to them. Several sirens soon started blaring at a deafening level. I'm new here and nobody else is around. I don't know how to shut the sirens off. FML

#20844606
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34060) - you deserved it (6034)

On 08/19/2013 at 12:00pm - work - by oops (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my band informed me that our gig this afternoon was actually a wedding. Whose wedding? My ex-wife's, along with the guy she cheated on me with. For their first dance, I had to sing what used to be our song. FML

#20844435
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73584) - you deserved it (4054)

On 08/19/2013 at 9:06am - love - by Love stinks (man) - United States

Today, I got to watch how easy it is to break into my flat, after I locked myself out and went to my neighbour for help. He used a blunt pencil. FML

Today, I found out that if someone flushes a toilet the same time I'm starting the washing machine, my house will flood. FML

#20844207
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37654) - you deserved it (2275)

On 08/19/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by Ben - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my sister had an emotional breakdown because two guys love her and she can't pick just one. Meanwhile I'm single and spend my time laying treats on my floor in a pattern and watching my rabbit run in circles. FML

#20843729
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41082) - you deserved it (3256)

On 08/18/2013 at 9:36pm - misc - by Having a pretty sister sucks. - United States (Texas)

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

#20842045
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44874) - you deserved it (5220)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by frustrated - Ireland (Kerry)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

#20841635
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51653) - you deserved it (4249)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)



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