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TheAwkHawk

Offline (the 09/04/2014 at 8:31am) | Search for a member

TheAwkHawk

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 940
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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TheAwkHawk's page activity

Visits<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 4:18am<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:19pm<b>lauren12983</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 4:20pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 12:54am<b>kkpaige</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 10:03pm<b>toneeangel</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 5:26pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 7:55pm<b>_briianna</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 9:37pm<b>QuantumLife</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 9:38pm<b>jen1682</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 1:07pm<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 12:18pm<b>MasqueradePrince</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 6:51am<b>Sael</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 1:31pm<b>Incognito_1924</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 11:32am<b>ColaNation</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 11:52pm<b>Hunter8787</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 7:48pm<b>ifhydomo23</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 12:10am<b>Doritozilla</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 9:24pm

TheAwkHawk's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of TheAwkHawk's badges

TheAwkHawk's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to mah friend stroking mah face with the bottom of his foot an whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

#20661280
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39654) - you deserved it (4058)

On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, the regional manager of mah company cummed out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that mah palms were sweaty, andhen he reached out to shake mah hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, u made me wet." FML

#20660456
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48089) - you deserved it (9183)

On 05/13/2013 at 8:01am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, our cat did!! My five-year-old trid to flush him down the toilet!! FML

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of mah breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

#20630276
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47890) - you deserved it (12097)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:51pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today , a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically bieng placed under house arrest by birds. FML

#20630234
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43407) - you deserved it (3704)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today , I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl an ask her about it. The girl denied it an said she looool didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me , called me a liar an punched me in the face. FML

#20629579
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24265) - you deserved it (57918)

On 04/29/2013 at 1:26am - love - by bad day Brutus (man) - United States

Today , I overheard my grandpa telling my mom he'd found a load of porn in my laptop's browser history , but that he deleted all the "filth" so she wouldn't have to see it . She believed him an I got grounded , much to his amusement . I've never looked up porn on that computer in my life . FML

#20623130
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40125) - you deserved it (2705)

On 04/26/2013 at 1:34pm - misc - by thats what my ipod is for (man) - United States

today I proposd to mah grlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheerd 4 us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement did down, she leand over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

#20622674
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73222) - you deserved it (10094)

On 04/26/2013 at 5:17am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulld up and askd if I wantd to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. big fat FML

#20622653
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41786) - you deserved it (8919)

On 04/26/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by KingUrge (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got home and noticed people were looking at my next-door nieghbor's house that is fir rent. Peering closer, I realized my ex-boyfriend and the girl he cheated on me with a few months ago are inside. After they left, the ( for rent ) sign came down. I've got new nieghbors. FML

#20622139
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50563) - you deserved it (2754)

On 04/25/2013 at 11:01pm - love - by nodullmoment (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today I was drivinghen I noticd that the guy in front was on the phone. I pulld up next to him pulld out my phone an I made a gesture that he needd to puttd his phone away. It was a cop. I got a ticket fir drivinghile on my cell phone. FML

#20621724
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38870) - you deserved it (31395)

On 04/25/2013 at 8:56pm - money - by really_now - United States (Nevada)

TODAY, MY SISTER WAS CRYING TO ME ABOUT HOW HER BOYFRIEND NEVER SHOWD UP FOR THERE DATE. HE'S DONE THIS MANY TIMES BEFORE, SO I SUGGESTD THE FACT THAT MAYBE HE'D JUST DITCHD HER. SHE SAID THAT WAS RIDICULOUS, BECAUSE "HE'S CANADIAN" AN ACCORDING TO HER, "THEY DON'T LIE." REAL FML

#20621115
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44577) - you deserved it (4979)

On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I ad a formal complaint fild against me fir being outrageously rude to a customer. All I did was tell a customer tat se couldn't use food stamps at te movie teater. FML

#20620985
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44495) - you deserved it (2525)

On 04/25/2013 at 3:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today... my seven-year-old nephew challengd me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me... and then askd my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

#20617598
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52513) - you deserved it (21471)

On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - kids - by BIGCHEIFAAA (man) - United States (California)

TADAY AT WORK AT A FARM, WE GOT A NEW CALF. IT LOOKD LIKE IT HAD TO POOP, BUT WAS HAVING DIFFICULTY. ABOUT FOUR HOURS LATER IT STILL HADN'T POOPD. TURNS OUT IT WAS BORN WITHOUT AN ACTUAL BUTTHOLE. IT WAS THERE, JUST SEALD UP BY SKIN. I LITERALLY HAD TO CUT THIS POOR CALF A NEW BUTTHOLE. FML

#20617044
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82392) - you deserved it (4296)

On 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm - animals - by halliemarie1818 - United States



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