TheAwkHawk

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Offline (the 09/04/2014 at 8:31am)

TheAwkHawk

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1646
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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TheAwkHawk's page activity

Visits<b>TitanGodChaos</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 11:20pm<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 4:18am<b>smallzz993</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:19pm<b>lauren12983</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 4:20pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 12:54am<b>kkpaige</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 10:03pm<b>toneeangel</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 5:26pm<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 7:55pm<b>_briianna</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 9:37pm<b>QuantumLife</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 9:38pm<b>jen1682</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 1:07pm<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 12:18pm<b>MasqueradePrince</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 6:51am<b>Sael</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 1:31pm<b>Incognito_1924</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 11:32am<b>ColaNation</b> - the 08/08/2013 at 11:52pm<b>Hunter8787</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 7:48pm<b>ifhydomo23</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 12:10am

Fucked!<b>TitanGodChaos</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 5:20am

TheAwkHawk's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of TheAwkHawk's badges

TheAwkHawk's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 8:01am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, our cat died. My five-year-old tried to flush him down the toilet. FML

by JamiesMom / 05/13/2013 at 12:29am / United States (Michigan) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2013 at 12:51pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Health

Today, a family of geese nested outside my halls of residence. They have started attacking everyone who tries to get in or out of the building. I'm basically being placed under house arrest by birds. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2013 at 12:14pm / United Kingdom (York) / Animals

Today, I confessed to cheating to my girlfriend. She decided to go up to the girl and ask her about it. The girl denied it and said she didn't even know me. My girlfriend walked up to me, called me a liar and punched me in the face. FML

by bad day Brutus / 04/29/2013 at 1:26am / United States / Love

Today, I overheard my grandpa telling my mom he'd found a load of porn in my laptop's browser history, but that he deleted all the "filth" so she wouldn't have to see it. She believed him and I got grounded, much to his amusement. I've never looked up porn on that computer in my life. FML

by thats what my ipod is for / 04/26/2013 at 1:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 5:17am / Love

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

by KingUrge / 04/26/2013 at 4:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got home and noticed people were looking at my next-door neighbor's house that is for rent. Peering closer, I realized my ex-boyfriend and the girl he cheated on me with a few months ago are inside. After they left, the "for rent" sign came down. I've got new neighbors. FML

by nodullmoment / 04/25/2013 at 11:01pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was driving when I noticed that the guy in front was on the phone. I pulled up next to him, pulled out my phone and I made a gesture that he needed to put his phone away. It was a cop. I got a ticket for driving while on my cell phone. FML

by really_now / 04/25/2013 at 8:56pm / United States (Nevada) / Transportation

Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I had a formal complaint filed against me for being outrageously rude to a customer. All I did was tell a customer that she couldn't use food stamps at the movie theater. FML

by Anonymous / 04/25/2013 at 3:37pm / United States (Georgia) / Work

Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML

by BIGCHEIFAAA / 04/24/2013 at 12:55am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

by halliemarie1818 / 04/23/2013 at 10:01pm / United States / Animals