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ThatOnePerson97

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ThatOnePerson97

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ThatOnePerson97's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. As things got heated, he broke down crying. I assumed it was just anxiety so I hugged him and told him it's alright and that it didn't matter, we'd try another time. Half an hour later, he confessed that he's actually gay. FML

Today, I sent my girlfriend a long-overdue message telling her I feel like she doesn't really care about me any more, that it seems like she only ever calls me when she needs money, and that I'm even starting to suspect she may be cheating on me. 14 hours later, she replied: "TL;DR". FML

#21320982
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20473) - you deserved it (2376)

On 12/20/2014 at 3:45pm - love - by KalaKa (man) - United States

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

#21320716
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26049) - you deserved it (3499)

On 12/20/2014 at 2:33am - love - by qyx3lmnop24 - United States (California)

Today, I was shocked to notice that my hair has started growing out entirely silver, supposedly due to pregnancy. I'm 19. Apparently, according to my aunt, "It runs in the family." FML

#21320202
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26307) - you deserved it (5344)

On 12/19/2014 at 5:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML

#21319982
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29008) - you deserved it (3566)

On 12/18/2014 at 9:39pm - love - by I warned him - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had my midterm finals for AP Literature. My teacher had good news and bad news for us. The bad news? That he lost the file for our original exam and so had to make a harder exam for us. An exam he told us not to study for. The good news? "Jesus Christ suffered and died for our sins." FML

#21319606
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29672) - you deserved it (2780)

On 12/18/2014 at 7:11am - misc - by subversivepanda (woman) - Guam

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my mother-in-law asked for a copy of my son's death certificate so she could have her week-long island beach holiday classed as bereavement leave. FML

Today, my boss heard a rumor that I was in a relationship with a fellow co-worker. He assured me that inside relationships weren't against any store policy, so I confirmed it. He then fired my boyfriend anyway. FML

#21318814
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28597) - you deserved it (4518)

On 12/16/2014 at 10:31pm - work - by thankssomuch - United States (Maine)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Today, my classmate said I looked better without makeup. Well, her exact words were, "You look like less of a whore without makeup." FML

Today, my new friend tried to introduce me to "American Culture," as I am new to the city. He explained what a hamburger is and how it differs from the Asian food I was used to eating. I moved from Seattle and have worked at Burger King. FML

#21317624
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31261) - you deserved it (2429)

On 12/14/2014 at 10:30pm - misc - by AsianSensation (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ate at Subway during my lunch hour. A group of teenage girls sat down at the table next to mine. They all shared good laugh about the "friendless, chubby chick" sitting near them, while attempting to discreetly point at me. FML

#21317606
132 comments

Today, my parents decided to finally kick me out of the house because they've gotten tired of seeing me "sleep around all day and being so lazy" whenever I'm home. I'm currently triple-shifting for 6 days a week. FML

#21317150
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31267) - you deserved it (2348)

On 12/14/2014 at 2:50am - work - by wallamanut (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, after months of saving, I went to buy the wedding ring I promised to buy my fiancée. Just seconds after I walked in, the owner asked me to leave, saying he doesn't serve "trash" like me, while pointing at the memorial tattoo on the back of my hand. FML

#21316839
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31170) - you deserved it (2903)

On 12/13/2014 at 3:21pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after months of correcting him, I got so used to my boss calling me "Alex" that I didn't respond to my own name several times today. FML



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