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ThatOnePerson97

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ThatOnePerson97

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YDI master

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ThatOnePerson97's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my boyfriend that it's time for him to stop blaming others and own up to his mistakes. He retorted, "Don't blame me!" FML

#21288212
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17430) - you deserved it (1907)

On 10/30/2014 at 3:25am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my skinny co-worker complained that sitting just underneath the AC vent was making her too cold. My boss had us switch places, because "your mass keeps you warm anyway". FML

#21288043
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21441) - you deserved it (3037)

On 10/29/2014 at 10:41pm - work - by OfficeFatty - United States

Today, I watched as the teenage neighbor girl tried to parallel-park between me and my wife's cars. She was doing pretty well until she backed into mine, got scared, hit the accelerator and ran into my wife's. FML

#21287621
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31399) - you deserved it (2280)

On 10/29/2014 at 11:24am - misc - by carless - United States

Today, my little sister decided to color-in my favorite black-and-white comic book. It was worth over $200. When I told my mother, she said, "Oh that old thing? I thought it was a stupid coloring book you were too stupid to color." FML

Today, I had my first job interview. The manager asks me to sell him his pen. Thinking I'm all smart, I reenact the scene from the Wolf of Wall Street and say, 'Write down your name'. He calmly reaches into his drawer, takes out another pen and writes his name down. He then looks at me and laughs. FML

#21287428
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25723) - you deserved it (6527)

On 10/29/2014 at 12:55am - work - by shadysheikh - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went to a first aid training course. I had to lie on the floor and pretend I was unconscious. We were supposed to be doing the recovery position, but the guy I was working with decided to perform CPR instead and grope my boobs in the process. FML

#21287010
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27495) - you deserved it (2557)

On 10/28/2014 at 2:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I reprimanded three students for sleeping, five for not having books, and kicked three out for texting in class. One student yelled at me for a bad grade, and another stormed out for a failing exam score. I teach at a four-year university. FML

Today, I watched my co-worker throw the mother of all temper tantrums. He's a radio personality, and just learned that he's not famous enough to use the "Don't you know who I am?" line to get out of a traffic ticket. FML

#21286268
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27336) - you deserved it (2494)

On 10/27/2014 at 12:25pm - work - by Radio GaGa (man) - Canada

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29854) - you deserved it (4323)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, there was a laundry basket of my clothes sitting in my room. My dad asked me if they were clean or not. When I said I didn't know, he picked up a piece of my clothing, sniffed it, and said it smelled fine. That piece of clothing just so happened to be my underwear. FML

#21285867
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26445) - you deserved it (5114)

On 10/26/2014 at 8:05pm - misc - by socreepedouticanteven - United States (West Virginia)

Today, at my apartment complex, I was carrying a bag of trash up to the dumpster. A guy stopped his car and helped me carry it the rest of the way. I thanked him and he asked me out. I explained that I was married. He grabbed the trash bag and carried it back to my apartment. FML

#21285821
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31898) - you deserved it (3457)

On 10/26/2014 at 6:46pm - love - by mellielynnemily - United States

Today, I finally felt ready to give my boyfriend a blowjob. Barely 20 seconds in, he said: "I'll be honest, this is TERRIBLE." FML

#21285558
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33442) - you deserved it (6840)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:25am - intimacy - by soisblueballsdickhead (woman) - United States

Today, I was shopping at my workplace, out of uniform, with my husband. A customer recognised me and wanted me to serve him, but I couldn't since we can be fired for doing so while off-duty. He complained to my manager, who wasted no time publicly bitching me out. FML

#21285416
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31353) - you deserved it (2105)

On 10/26/2014 at 1:53am - work - by iskiel (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was hugging my girlfriend after she had a really bad day at work, when she burst into tears and started sobbing. For some reason that I'll never understand, it gave me a hard-on. She felt it, and now she thinks I'm a sick bastard. FML

#21285040
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29424) - you deserved it (4890)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was waiting at a traffic light next to an ice cream van. The man in it turned to me and winked, making sexual hand gestures. I felt my childhood die horribly as I watched. FML

#21284616
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31118) - you deserved it (2392)

On 10/24/2014 at 8:30pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)



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