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Terminator7786

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Terminator7786

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 26 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2160
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

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Terminator7786's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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Terminator7786's favorite FMLs

Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML

#21249886
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16085) - you deserved it (1273)

On 09/01/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by s0728 - United States (Texas)

Today, it's been three weeks since my dad finished growing what he calls a "Jesus beard" and gone out asking for donations and claiming to be Jesus Christ. I've been trying and failing to get a job for 2 years, and he's already raking in cash from gullible idiots. FML

#21247834
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32519) - you deserved it (2965)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47971) - you deserved it (9431)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42524) - you deserved it (7393)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39262) - you deserved it (8128) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

#21239517
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41857) - you deserved it (13578)

On 08/17/2014 at 2:15am - kids - by you ripped them off ages ago (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I found out my girlfriend has been cheating on me. When I told my sister, she just smiled, held up a closed fist, and said "Look at the number of fucks I give!" She then raised a finger, said "Oops. Finger spasm!" then lowered it again. FML

#21238375
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42720) - you deserved it (4147)

On 08/15/2014 at 6:09pm - love - by meltdowninrels (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML

#21234756
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34929) - you deserved it (2998)

On 08/11/2014 at 10:18am - work - by mcmanager - United States (California)

Today, my husband and I attended a funeral. After the service, my phone vibrated. It was a text from my husband, saying "I've got mourning wood like you wouldn't believe! get it? MOURNING. haha :D" I looked up and saw him across the room, winking at me. Not the place, honey. FML

#21234106
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45883) - you deserved it (5463)

On 08/10/2014 at 3:26pm - intimacy - by jackie89 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cornwall)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48478) - you deserved it (19168)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that if you wake your 7-year old sister up by plugging her nose, you'll wake up the next morning, taped down and unable to move as she pours ice water on you. FML

#21230047
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24437) - you deserved it (51194)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:51pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42459) - you deserved it (4363)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I held the door open for a woman and her kids on my way out of the bank. She started accusing me of patronizing her, and when I just let go of the door in protest, she deliberately leaned in so it hit her in the face. I felt the glares from the entire bank as she pretended to cry. FML

#21220355
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45523) - you deserved it (3424)

On 07/25/2014 at 2:16pm - misc - by notadoorman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I was out with my boyfriend, when he started browsing wedding rings. He found a ring, proposed to me right there in front of a crowd, and then was promptly denied a payment plan. We left without a ring. FML

#21216427
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52853) - you deserved it (4873)

On 07/21/2014 at 3:31pm - love - by badluck - Canada (Alberta)



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