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Tech_N9ne

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Tech_N9ne
  • Town/Country : Thousand Oaks, United States of America
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2880
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Tech_N9ne : I'm Tech.

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Tech_N9ne's favorite FMLs

Today, I was going to ask this girl I love to homecoming. I set up a scavenger hunt, and my friend led her through it. At the end of the scavenger hunt I had a note that said, "Homecoming?" She said yes and hugged my friend. When I told her it was me who was asking, she laughed and said no. FML

#5058289
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37436) - you deserved it (7508)

On 09/05/2009 at 10:16am - love - by thisrllysucks (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML

#5050946
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13617) - you deserved it (42487)

On 09/04/2009 at 11:07pm - misc - by flexibleflatulance (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was awakened by the sound of chain-saws. Moments later a tree branch came through my roof. FML

#5040554
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40451) - you deserved it (1713)

On 09/04/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by 1ndustrytx (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while riding in the car with my friends, we stopped at a red light. To our left, a very obese, middle aged man slowly unbuttoned his shirt and spread it out. He then stared at us while massaging his nipples with his thumb and index fingers for the duration of the red light. FML

#5034499
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42247) - you deserved it (4849)

On 09/04/2009 at 1:15am - misc - by Scarred (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I figured out that a $40 phone case does not protect your $500 phone from a five year old throwing it off a fourth story balcony. FML

#5012990
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36385) - you deserved it (7563)

On 09/03/2009 at 12:37am - kids - by eagerbeaver (man) - United States

Today, I was driving into a parking lot with some friends. I carelessly passed a sign when my friend said, "Wait what did that sign say?" I backed up to read it and guess what it said: "Severe Tire Damage. Do Not Back Up." Now all 4 of my tires are slashed. FML

#5006277
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14103) - you deserved it (36232)

On 09/02/2009 at 8:18pm - misc - by ooops (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my school to take my yearbook picture. I was wearing a shirt that said ANALOG on the front. When I bent in to take the picture, part of my shirt overlapped itself. Now I'm known as the ANAL kid in the yearbook. FML

#5002532
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34057) - you deserved it (2103)

On 09/02/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by boytoy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, when we were at wrestling practice, we had to bend over to stretch. When I bent down, I noticed a car on the street stopped. There was a sixty year old man watching us. He then licked his lips and drove away. FML

#5001018
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37591) - you deserved it (3571)

On 09/02/2009 at 4:07pm - work - by iceman123432 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having lunch with my boyfriend and talking about how stressed out I've been because of my job. While I'm speaking, he pulls out his phone and says his boss is texting him and it was important. There was a game of Tetris reflecting onto his glasses from his phone. FML

#5000239
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40700) - you deserved it (6204)

On 09/02/2009 at 3:17pm - love - by littlemissignored (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I decided to lay out topless in my fenced-in backyard. For about an hour, everything was going great until I sneezed and my creepy, middle-aged neighbor said "bless you". From my bushes. FML

#4998689
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42188) - you deserved it (12442)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I thought it would be sexy to surprise my boyfriend by hiding in the closet naked and pouncing on him as he came to get his pants. I never got to the pouncing. Apparently my boyfriend has heightened reflexes so instead I got slapped hard across the face. My ear is still ringing. FML

#4995103
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12439) - you deserved it (38913)

On 09/02/2009 at 7:19am - intimacy - by keepsmiling - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, my mum hit me with her car as she was backing out of the drive way, hurting my leg and crushing my bike. For the third time this year. FML

#4994613
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44852) - you deserved it (8930)

On 09/02/2009 at 5:45am - health - by broken (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking with my boyfriend down the street and a really hot guy walked past with no shirt on. While distracted by his hardened stomach muscles, I promptly walked into a pole, then became single. FML

#4994498
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13070) - you deserved it (62315)

On 09/02/2009 at 5:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, I noticed my wife makes more satisfied groans when she's taking a big dump than she does when we make love. FML

#4992534
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20956) - you deserved it (5959)

On 09/02/2009 at 1:56am - intimacy - by turdburger (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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