TeaPirate

Search for a member

TeaPirate

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14402
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 16 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

TeaPirate's page activity

Visits<b>MyUsernameKatie</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 4:42pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 9:57pm<b>scott_m319</b> - the 10/07/2009 at 9:36pm<b>mewzik</b> - the 09/17/2009 at 11:00pm<b>navistarfire</b> - the 07/13/2009 at 1:54pm<b>mbgurl24</b> - the 07/05/2009 at 12:58pm<b>username666</b> - the 05/28/2009 at 5:16pm<b>chubs</b> - the 04/25/2009 at 3:33pm<b>bcr</b> - the 04/24/2009 at 11:08pm<b>altex4</b> - the 04/14/2009 at 3:28pm

TeaPirate's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

TeaPirate's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking on a path through a park by myself. I glanced at the ground and saw a shadow behind me. Thinking of an attacker, I screamed as loud as I could and began flailing my arms to ward him off. Turns out, it was a jogger. He had to stop due to his uncontrollable laughter. FML

by paranoid / 06/06/2009 at 12:43am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, while cleaning out a closet with my mother, I found a wish list from when I was five. On that list, I wished my parents would divorce. Not only did that seriously hurt my mom, but now she thinks I'm the devil because my wish came true. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2009 at 10:45pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my brother came out to our family as being gay. My mother starting crying because "She wanted grandchildren." I told her that I was planning on having children. She started crying harder. FML

by bopbop / 05/19/2009 at 9:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I lost track of time while rocking out, butt-naked, to Kelly Clarkson and Michelle Branch after taking a shower. Three of my metalhead friends had let themselves in my house and were on the lower level laughing their butts off at me for 30 minutes before telling me. I'm a 23 year old guy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 2:26am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I didn't have any money to buy a tampon from the dispenser at my school but my hands are small enough so I can just slide them up and grab one. My hand got stuck in the dispenser and my school had to call the fire department. Now everyone calls me tampon girl. FML

by obeezy / 04/30/2009 at 3:56pm / United States (Washington) / Money

Today, I was petsitting for my neighbor's new puppy. A huge thunderstorm came, and the puppy started whining and shivering violently. I pulled it into my lap to try and comfort it. One loud clap of thunder later, and the puppy had explosive diarrhea all over me. FML

by Puppysit88 / 04/16/2009 at 5:36pm / United States (North Carolina) / Animals

Today, I was walking back to my home in the city in the dark. I'm paranoid, so when I saw movement behind me I clutched my mace. The faster I walked, the closer the person seemed to be. I spun around and sprayed my attacker with mace. It was my shadow and the wind blew the mace back into eyes. FML

by Eyesore / 04/16/2009 at 5:27pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking through the park eating fries. There was an old woman feeding a few pigeons. They didn't seem too interested, so I threw some fries down as I walked by to try and help her out. About 2 minutes later, I heard screaming. A huge group of pigeons were attacking the old woman. FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2009 at 10:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

by eun / 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous