About TayonaC : :D
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Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
TayonaC's favorite FMLs
Today, I had to visit a client because his printer had broken down. After driving for an hour, then being screamed at about how horrible my company's service is, I walked over to his printer and found the problem: there was no paper loaded. FML
by Anonymous / 09/03/2013 at 3:50pm / United States / Work
by D / 09/03/2013 at 2:04pm / United States (California) / Health
by NoNotCats =^._.^= / 09/03/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by fml / 09/03/2013 at 2:31am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by poolgirl789 / 09/03/2013 at 2:30am / United Kingdom (Bradford) / Intimacy
Today, my husband thought it would be acceptable to watch Breaking Bad on Netflix with my 4-year-old in the room. What happened to be the only line he picked up? "Well heil Hitler, bitch!" I found out from his preschool teacher. FML
by Anonymous / 09/03/2013 at 12:13am / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by aherdofpigs / 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 2:22pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/02/2013 at 12:16am / United States (Nevada) / Health
by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 12:34pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. They thought it'd be hilarious to put on ridiculous accents and act like country hicks, spewing obscenities and strongly hinting that we're into incest. She soon left in disgust. I haven't heard back from her since. FML
by >_< / 08/30/2013 at 6:56pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm / United States (New York) / Money
Today, I was playing with my phone after midnight, and I kept getting calls from a withheld number. The guy just breathed heavily and wouldn't speak. When the third call came, I asked "who the hell are you?" The call ended, and my dad yelled from outside my door: "ME! Now go to sleep!" FML
by thanks, dad... / 08/30/2013 at 1:24pm / Romania (Maramures) / Kids
Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML
by Anonymous / 08/30/2013 at 12:14pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" and I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship for over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML
by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:48pm / United Kingdom / Love
- Today, my boyfriend refused to go down on me because I smelled of baby lotion and it made him feel… Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told… Today, I finally had my tongue piercing heal up so I decided to try oral on my girl. Unfortunately,…
- Today, I live in Romania and my walls are particularly thin. After enduring my neighbor’s parties,… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, I’m in Mexico for an internship. I was at a party when a drunk guy harangued me, calling me…