About TayonaC : :D
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, due to the heat, I had a deadly asthma attack. Where was my inhaler? My dad pawned it for beer money. What did my dad do about my attack? Told me to quit being a Drama Queen. I had to go across the street and beg for a ride to the ER from my neighbor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50326) - you deserved it (2273)
On 09/19/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by asthmasucks (man) - United States (California)
Today, my daughter used the kids potty chair on her own for the first time. Bad: The bucket was not in it so poo hit the floor. Good: she tried to clean it... Bad: with her socks. Good: she decided to clean the socks. Bad: she used the wall. Good: she finally called dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37204) - you deserved it (3176)
On 09/10/2009 at 3:51am - kids - by Udxero (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at the store buying some feminine products. At the cash register, the clerk said to me "Dude, you know those are for girls right?" I am a 30 year old woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38057) - you deserved it (3713)
On 08/24/2009 at 12:48am - misc - by secretdeo (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I farted while I was in line at the bank. I tried to pretend it wasn't me by looking at the man behind me and turning back with a disgusted look on my face. I thought I had gotten away with it when the man yells "It wasn't me, this bitch did it". FML
I agree, your life sucks (6114) - you deserved it (72765)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:39am - misc - by moutz (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was playing catch with my 6 year old cousin in the garden, when he demanded a piggy back. Trying to be the good cousin, I did so and he soon shouts "Run! Run!" so I do so. Suddenly he shouts "STOP! My winky's gone pointy". I gave my 6 year old cousin an erection. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49865) - you deserved it (4178)
On 08/18/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by Girl - United Kingdom (Hampshire)
Today, I found out that doctors can be wrong. Pink clothes, pink stroller, pink bottles, pink bibs, pink cribs and pink bedding to go with my baby that recently came out with a little pink penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45901) - you deserved it (15272)
On 08/12/2009 at 7:36pm - kids - by Ouch (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I drunkenly made out with my 65 year-old married female boss. I'm a 21 year-old male intern. I have a feeling work will be awkward tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8713) - you deserved it (49517)
On 08/08/2009 at 6:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I was working at the gas station. An old lady was watching me fill her gas tank. A really beautiful girl walked by. I lost concentration and overfilled the tank. I quickly pulled it out and squirted the old lady with a bit of petrol. She was smiling and gave a slight moan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41513) - you deserved it (9492)
On 07/09/2009 at 1:50pm - intimacy - by Fattie (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)
Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9358) - you deserved it (42088)
On 06/21/2009 at 3:34am - misc - by TBaggins00 (man) - United States (Illilois)
Today, I was at the mall with some friends. In the food court we passed by this creepy pervert feeling up a woman. I take a closer look and realize with horror that the guy is my dad in sunglasses and a hat. The lady he was with was not my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69322) - you deserved it (2101)
On 06/18/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States
Today, I was at the mall with some friends. In the food court we passed by this creepy pervert feeling up a woman. I take a closer look and realize with horror that the guy is my dad in sunglasses and a hat. The lady he was with was not my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69322) - you deserved it (2101)
On 06/18/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by traumatized (woman) - United States
Today, I had the closing shift at work in a cafe and there was a man and lady left. I made them coffee and started to close up. When the lady finished her coffee she grabbed my arm and said 'I think that man is masturbating' and leaves in a hurry. I had to wait for him to finish before closing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51987) - you deserved it (2819)
On 06/05/2009 at 3:43am - intimacy - by MBG (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27684) - you deserved it (43369)
On 05/28/2009 at 1:15pm - health - by ITguy1982 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I was shaving my balls with a blade razor because my electric trimmer had died and I had a big date with the girl of my dreams. I moved too quickly and accidentally knicked a vein in my scrotum. I had to hold gauze over my balls until the paramedics arrived. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27684) - you deserved it (43369)
On 05/28/2009 at 1:15pm - health - by ITguy1982 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, I went to a dollar store with a couple friends to buy cap guns to play with. We were having a lot of fun with them, and took them onto a bus. 5 minutes later, three cops got on, handcuffed us, and sternly talked to us about the dangers of guns. We got arrested for toy guns. We are 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14029) - you deserved it (40623)
On 05/23/2009 at 3:37am - misc - by arrestedgun (man) - Canada
Monday 20 May 2013
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