TayonaC

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Offline (the 09/17/2014 at 7:33pm)

TayonaC

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 1 November 1995 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 13082
  • Number of comments : 230
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About TayonaC : :D

TayonaC's page activity

Visits<b>nickinoodle</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 3:42pm<b>Stiggy626</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 9:27am<b>MrMoofinMan</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 4:03am<b>Maxwellminpin</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 5:04am<b>1HateMyUsername</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 6:54am<b>Westifer</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 2:57pm<b>cmat84</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 8:53pm<b>APoopVirus</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 12:19am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 10:04pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 12:07pm<b>amann27</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 9:58am<b>dafuq1</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 7:50am<b>teentee401</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 6:19pm<b>M1987</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 2:27pm<b>FuckThisLogin</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 9:49pm<b>DoomSkuller</b> - the 10/15/2015 at 1:02am<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 10/14/2015 at 3:37pm<b>DJZach101</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 10:39pm

TayonaC's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of TayonaC's badges

TayonaC's favorite FMLs

Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 11:29am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

by YouSoSmelly / 08/02/2013 at 9:58am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML

by whyeventry? / 08/02/2013 at 12:39am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, my husband begged me to go down on him while he sat on the toilet, taking a crap. He tried to convince me that we'd both somehow experience mind-blowing orgasms. FML

by countryblumpkin / 08/01/2013 at 2:06pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I had my first wet dream. I woke up sweating and soaking wet. Too bad I dreamed about having intense sex with a cardboard box. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2013 at 12:28pm / Belgium (West-Vlaanderen) / Intimacy

Today, I crawled into bed with my boyfriend. He was snoring loudly which is how I knew he was passed out cold. Once I was under the blanket next to him, he slowly turned over, stared me straight in the face and said, "I have to kill you". Then started snoring again. FML

by mtr1594 / 07/31/2013 at 2:47am / United States (Nevada) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband bought me a big box of tampons. He claims to know when my period is about to start before I do. Sadly, he's right. FML

by RayneWolf13 / 07/31/2013 at 2:31am / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

by JustSomeGuy / 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I was reading in my apartment. Due to a heatwave and my lack of AC, I was completely naked. My cat jumped onto my lap, and as her claws dug into my stomach, I recoiled. This caused her to retreat, clawing at my nether regions in the process. My pussy mauled my pussy. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 5:18pm / United States / Animals

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

by vanillaforme / 07/27/2013 at 7:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I finished off the last of the BBQ chips in the house. When my 6-year-old sister found out about it, she started screaming, then pulled down her pants and peed on the kitchen floor. My parents, after witnessing the whole thing, bitched me out for upsetting her. FML

by poopiter / 07/27/2013 at 2:31pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML

by Anonymous / 07/26/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked into an elderly man's room in the hospital I work to give him his food. After he struggled to sit up, I noticed his hand move down towards his crotch. He looked me straight in the eye and said, "I have to do this to my scrotum because it gets sweaty and sticks to my leg." FML

by scrotumscratcher / 07/25/2013 at 1:20am / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that even though my boyfriend thinks that peeing on me in the shower is acceptable, he will still freak out and call me disgusting if I try to use the toilet while he's taking a shower. FML

by Anonymous / 07/24/2013 at 12:36pm / United States (Alaska) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting freaky with my boyfriend and told him to spank me. In a seductive voice, he told me not to tell him what to do. Continuing, I asked him how he was going to punish me, to which he then replied, "I'm going to punch you straight in the face." FML

by suckstosuck / 07/23/2013 at 12:04am / United States (California) / Intimacy