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TaurusTheBull

Offline (the 08/28/2015 at 4:14pm) | Search for a member

TaurusTheBull

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 14 May 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 16090
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 44 posted

About TaurusTheBull :

TaurusTheBull's page activity

Visits<b>omarj03</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:35pm<b>zanoty</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 2:24pm<b>imateapot_723</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:49pm<b>Benjaminkamp</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 5:07am<b>involentnumber0</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:16am<b>JesterMay</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 9:33am<b>PossiblyInDanger</b> - the 04/05/2014 at 10:04am<b>SiriusArtistry</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 1:50am<b>elliecraig17</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 9:23pm<b>DoctorWatson</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 4:37pm<b>dylanjenkins1340</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 3:53pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 3:03pm<b>imbackwiththeshi</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 3:03pm<b>Manspider91</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 2:32pm<b>justsayinxp</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 2:31pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 1:21pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 11:27pm<b>DropTheDaggerxx</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 11:15pm

TaurusTheBull's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of TaurusTheBull's badges

TaurusTheBull's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33493) - you deserved it (15691)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was searched and questioned at the airport for having an apple. FML

#20971832
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40145) - you deserved it (4494)

On 11/26/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I let my sister hold my newborn daughter for the first time. I heard her mutter under her breath, "I could kill you so easily..." FML

Today, I donated blood. Afterwards, I regained consciousness on the floor with a half-eaten cookie in my mouth. FML

Today, I realized how amazing I've become at faking orgasms: I made up everything from the noises of my juices to pure, blissful climax over the phone to my husband. He came; I finished putting laundry away. FML

#20955991
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49989) - you deserved it (13153)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:40am - intimacy - by CanWeAllGetOne - United States (Texas)

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48350) - you deserved it (13154)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, I failed hard at a color test. I thought it was a joke because most of the colors looked the same to me. Now I know why people laugh at my clothes color choices. FML

#20936339
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45423) - you deserved it (3151)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was using my new curling iron to curl my hair. I was sitting down. Suddenly I dropped the iron and, as a reflex, I caught it between my bare thighs. FML

#20927250
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44961) - you deserved it (5531)

On 10/20/2013 at 8:39am - health - by cantcloselegs (woman) - United States

Today, I asked my students to buy a copy of Anne Frank's diary for an assignment. One of them asked me in all seriousness who wrote it. FML

#20925665
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44713) - you deserved it (4667) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/18/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by Huedadaa - France (Picardie)

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

#20919376
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55468) - you deserved it (3540)

On 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by mustabeendrugs (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML

#20910543
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45768) - you deserved it (7659)

On 10/07/2013 at 2:11am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML

#20909921
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59244) - you deserved it (3549)

On 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

#20908389
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48547) - you deserved it (3995)

On 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm - misc - by british_babe (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44584) - you deserved it (5627)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)



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