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Today, I got into an argument with my mom over her sexist, emotionally-abusive boyfriend. I told her that either he goes or I go. She called me a disrespectful bastard for not respecting my "new father." I'm now sitting outside a McDonald's with my suitcase, leeching their WiFi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26298) - you deserved it (1647)
On 09/08/2012 at 1:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that I'm not actually allergic to chocolate, when my mom freely admitted to me that she made it up when I was a child because she didn't want to share any cookies with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27047) - you deserved it (1361)
On 08/30/2012 at 8:58am - misc - by Sarah - United States (New York)
Today, my son, who seems to think that he is a "gangsta" despite being a white boy from the suburbs, cried because I accidentally burned his grilled cheese. He's 28. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22640) - you deserved it (4098)
On 08/28/2012 at 12:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument which resulted in her begging for a divorce and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21688) - you deserved it (1542)
On 08/26/2012 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by picture, during a game of Draw Something. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24443) - you deserved it (1664)
On 08/26/2012 at 1:03am - love - by wtf - New Zealand (Southland)
Today, I visited my mother's new apartment, and found a picture of yours truly hanging above her toilet, and I asked why it was there. She shrugged and said, "Because the thought of you makes me want to take a shit?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14125) - you deserved it (1285)
On 08/07/2012 at 2:04pm - misc - by Alisha - United States (Virginia)
Today, while I was getting intimate with my husband, he moaned someone else's name. He actually tried to explain himself by saying that he'd had a "divine encounter," and while "possessed by the Lord," he'd been told the name of our future daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27697) - you deserved it (1979)
On 08/05/2012 at 1:45pm - intimacy - by lils (woman) - United States
Today, my fiancé told me that he was having second thoughts on our engagement. Instead of just calling it off, he took me to a fancy restaurant and took a public poll on whether we should get married. The majority said no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23219) - you deserved it (1749)
On 08/05/2012 at 9:20am - love - by exfiancee (woman) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, it was my wedding day. When my soon-to-be-husband was saying his vows, he didn't say my name. He said his mother's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21514) - you deserved it (1241)
On 08/04/2012 at 2:00am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)
Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26155) - you deserved it (4379)
On 08/01/2012 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I sold yet another £100 bottle of lotion to a stuck-up teenage fashionista with less brain-power than the yapping bastard of a dog she carried in her arms. She did nothing but brag the whole time about her jewelry, and openly mocked me for only making minimum wage. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19457) - you deserved it (1606)
On 07/13/2012 at 3:08pm - work - by fucking pissants (man) - United Kingdom
Today, my parents made a list of all the things they could have done had I not been born. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23659) - you deserved it (2039)
On 06/19/2012 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theunborn - France (Midi-Pyrenees)
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21374) - you deserved it (5709)
On 06/13/2012 at 10:21pm - intimacy - by biggieT - Sri Lanka (Western)
Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past life to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6904) - you deserved it (23504)
On 06/07/2012 at 5:26pm - health - by sh3n-D (man) - Denmark (Midtjylland)
Today, I had to get the manager of a grocery store to explain to his employee how coupons work. The employee had refused to accept the coupons I was using, for fear that, "they will be deducted from my paycheck." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15924) - you deserved it (1190)
On 05/29/2012 at 7:40am - money - by brunurb (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Monday 20 May 2013
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