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TRENZ
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TRENZ's favorite FMLs

Today, the day before I'm supposed to leave for a long-anticipated trip to Europe, my mother admitted that she's never paid for it. She only told me she did so I would stop hinting that I wanted to go. I gave up Christmas for this trip. FML

Today, after making several comments about how I didn't exactly look thin, my boyfriend said, "Well, at least we know you'll look good pregnant." FML

#20954137
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39621) - you deserved it (9109)

On 11/11/2013 at 4:41pm - love - by Cheer4Life (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42794) - you deserved it (6290)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at a party with a few of my friends. We saw a guy walking around with bright pink lipstick all over his mouth, so we made a bet to see who could match the lipstick to the girl first. I won. It was my girlfriend's. FML

#20953788
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52087) - you deserved it (3465)

On 11/11/2013 at 10:55am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40357) - you deserved it (2393)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand

Today, I went to an over-crowded grocery store. As I reached the front of a long line, I noticed that a cart had been abandoned in everybody's way. Trying to be helpful, I moved it to the side. An enormous woman then shoved me and yelled at me for "pushing her property around." FML

#20953468
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33488) - you deserved it (2829)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:17am - misc - by PainStressLife - United States (California)

Today, I found out that when you flush an animal clear of blood for research, there is a nerve inside the heart, which when you strike it right, electrical signals cause the animal to writhe as if alive. Now, my boss knows about my fear of zombies, and I'm now terrified of half my job. FML

#20953149
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34823) - you deserved it (4314)

On 11/10/2013 at 8:52pm - work - by kittkatt1 - United States (Michigan)

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

#20952990
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39277) - you deserved it (3290)

On 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was quizzing a girl at my college, and I noticed that when she answered a question, her ears wiggled. It was cute, so I pointed it out. She burst into tears, and the guy next to me said, "Way to make her feel insecure, douchebag." FML

Today, my husband and I went for our 20 week scan and found out we're having a girl. The first thing he said to me was, "The next one better be a boy or I'm leaving you". FML

#20952357
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46849) - you deserved it (4132)

On 11/10/2013 at 5:28am - kids - by Naomi - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after doing vigorous chores all day with my girlfriend, her mom came and paid us each $100. My girlfriend cried and threw a fit because she said they were her chores, so she deserves all the money. FML

#20952303
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44621) - you deserved it (3965)

On 11/10/2013 at 3:03am - love - by Go away - United States (Iowa)

Today, I met my brother's girlfriend. We got talking, and we got onto the subject of tattoos. I said how much I hated tramp stamps, and how they make girls look trashy. She said, "Like this?" and showed me hers. FML

#20952213
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35476) - you deserved it (16313)

On 11/10/2013 at 12:51am - misc - by tramp - United States

Today, after working all week on a group project, I realized I forgot to submit the assignment and missed the deadline. I now have to tell my group that we automatically failed. FML

Today, my boyfriend moved out and took all his things with him. He also took some things that didn't belong to him, namely my rent money. My landlord comes tomorrow. FML

#20951618
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37679) - you deserved it (2760)

On 11/09/2013 at 3:41pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, after hours of organizing and spending around $300 for my three-year-old's birthday party, I realized I forgot to send out the invitations. FML

#20951338
158 comments


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