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Mobility
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Today, I was at a water park with my family. While on the 100ft slide, my father decided it would be a great idea to pants me. I slipped and went down the 100ft slide naked for everyone to see. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30272) - you deserved it (2721)
On 08/06/2010 at 2:09pm - misc - by shitpile - United States
Today, I left work to find a note on my windshield that read, "I think you're cute," with a phone number written down as well. I got super excited and immediately dialed. The phone was answered by a woman laughing hysterically. It was my Mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28402) - you deserved it (4711)
On 12/12/2009 at 12:23am - love - by MarkTheShark (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I woke up feeling awesome. I turned to face the sunrise in the window, and as I stretched and let out a big yawn. Only for my boyfriend to say "Baby, turn back over. Your breath smells like turds." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22778) - you deserved it (8436)
On 11/28/2009 at 10:57am - love - by lol smiley face - United States
Today, I asked out this girl I've been spending a lot of time with lately. She told me she was only hanging out with me because she thought I was gay and wouldn't try to get in her pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36435) - you deserved it (3196)
On 06/16/2009 at 8:59pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)
Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML
I agree, your life sucks (350390) - you deserved it (41213)
On 05/10/2009 at 3:01pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I heard my boyfriend of 3 months talking with his friend, not knowing I could hear them. "Tonight's the night," my boyfriend says. "I'm finally going to tell her I love her!" I got really excited, deciding i loved him too. Then his friend says, "Awesome! But what about Kayla?" I'm Kayla. FML
I agree, your life sucks (180718) - you deserved it (9219)
On 03/22/2009 at 1:14pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was the only one in an elevator when an attractive girl came in, talking on her phone. She told her friend, "I have to go, there's a cute guy on this elevator." Before I could even react, she turned to me and said, "Sorry for lying, I really wanted to get off the phone with her." FML
I agree, your life sucks (186771) - you deserved it (8597)
On 03/10/2009 at 9:10pm - misc - by TuralSucks (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56958) - you deserved it (2857)
On 03/05/2009 at 8:51pm - kids - by SadDad - United States (Florida)
Today, in class my friend played a joke on me by pulling my seat from under me while i was about to sit. I fell and everybody laughed at me. During the next class, I did the same thing to him. He broke his arm. He was the star of the basketball team. Nobody laughed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37877) - you deserved it (20212)
On 02/19/2009 at 7:17pm - health - by Noname (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (182978) - you deserved it (61946)
On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)
Today, I won $5000 dollars from a lottery ticket and tried giving the man next to me a high five. He had no hands. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21596) - you deserved it (6910)
On 01/19/2009 at 5:26am - money - by Noname - Canada (Alberta)
Monday 17 June 2013
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