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Offline (the 03/25/2014 at 5:13am) | Search for a member
About T9FTW : I'm your typical jokester and a relatively friendly, fair guy. Here is (very little) information about my personality and habits.
I get quite ticked off when people are grammatically incorrect or just not in use of common sense... But I'm not a grammar Nazi, I swear it! Don't put me away!
Some people find this strange, so I'll just throw it in here: I don't watch television although I do have full access to it.
Also, I like to-- "Okay, wrap it up, guys!"
*rolls up the carpet, shuts out lights*
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I was throwing rocks into a pond while our class was on a field trip. The teacher started to pass around an old rare civil war bullet. As the bullet got to me, I threw another rock in the river, only to notice a rock in my hand and the bullet gone. FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML
Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML
Today, I paused the movie my girlfriend and I were watching and told her, for the first time, that I loved her. Her response was to stare at me silently for a few seconds before unpausing the film. FML
Today, a male co-worker asked me in what shape I shave my pubic hair. Jokingly, I replied that I have a very nicely trimmed dodecahedron. Now he's telling everyone at work that I have a venereal disease. FML
Friday 22 May 2015