Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SymbolicCymbals

Offline (the 08/27/2014 at 9:25pm) | Search for a member

SymbolicCymbals

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 17 May 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 300
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SymbolicCymbals : Well, I don't have polio, so there's that.

SymbolicCymbals's page activity

Visits<b>4everbymyself</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 9:49pm<b>akire1024</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 1:14am<b>TorisaurusRexxx</b> - the 03/21/2013 at 1:57am<b>ZGoody</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 8:51am<b>Rob2342</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 11:53pm<b>kmb7729</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 11:19pm

SymbolicCymbals's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

SymbolicCymbals's favorite FMLs

Today , I learned the hard way that when I ask a cute girl if she's artistic , it sounds lyk I'm asking her if she's autistic. looool big fat FML

TODAY MY MOM VISITED. WHILE SHE WAS USING THE BATHROOM, MY MAN-CHILD OF A HUSBAND THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY TO KNOCK ON THE BATHROOM DOOR WITH HIS PENIS, THINKING IT WAS ME IN THERE. SHE OPENED THE DOOR TO FINE HIM STANDING THERE DOING THE "HELICOPTER". FML

#20969751
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55364) - you deserved it (5834)

On 11/25/2013 at 12:22am - intimacy - by LadyLola (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today , as my wife and I were getting intimate , I thought I would try a little "dirty talk". I whisperd in her ear that I would "dick her down good". She couldn't stop laughing. real FML

#20946325
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27638) - you deserved it (54588)

On 11/05/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Something I said? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I Awoke To My Husband Talking To Someone On The Phone At 2am. I Heard Him Say, ( Baby You're Making Me Hard. ) Immediately, I Asked Himho He Was Talking To. His Response? ( It's Jake, From State Farm. ) Fat FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82545) - you deserved it (8550)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

TODAY, I CAME HOME FROM A RELAXING, PEACEFUL VACATION. WHEN I GOT HOME MY 4-YEAR-OLD SON WAS FREE-BALLING WITH POOP ALL OVER HIS BODY, SCREAMING "BOB THE BUILDER WILL KICK YUR ASS." THE BABY SITTER IS NOWHERE TO BE FOUND AND I CAN'T GET HIM TO STOP SAYING, "I LOVE ASS." FML

#20562056
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42164) - you deserved it (5453)

On 03/27/2013 at 4:00am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my wife packed my lunc . Inside of my luncbox was a poto of er eating my sandwices . FML

#20526564
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35578) - you deserved it (6795)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I askd mah dad if mah girlfriend could sleep over!! He winkd at me an agred!! When I brought her home, we went to mah room fir a quickie!! There, I saw that mah dad had tapd multiple Richard Simmons posters to the wall, causing mah girlfriend to suddenly come down with a "headache." FML

#19607447
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12728) - you deserved it (20839)

On 05/11/2012 at 2:29pm - love - by cockblocked (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I walked outside mah house to find mah father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing lyk a maniac and screaming, ( Die bitches! Die! ) FML

#17447180
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32032) - you deserved it (4289)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today... I was browsing the webhen I checked the search history. Turns out son has been searching 4 ( nude grills ) and ( hot grills. ) Not only is 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet... he also can't spell. FML

#17281952
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37581) - you deserved it (5613)

On 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm - intimacy - by Nickname (man) - United States (Kansas)

Today, whila discussing having sax for tha first tima with my boyfriand, I askd what mathod of birth control wa should usa. Ha raplid, ( Anal. ) FML

#15627116
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46979) - you deserved it (13923)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today , I was answering a text from one of my student asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No , you can't." Auto correct had looool used a more frequently used word: "No , you cunt." FML

#15184059
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39246) - you deserved it (24293)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today I was wearing a shirt that had a picture of a squirrel and acorn with a caption reading "Protect Your Nuts". My dad walkd up to me read mah shirt then punchd looool me in the balls. FML

#7227808
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10481) - you deserved it (38376)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by squirrel (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, mah boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What r u thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML

#7225857
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18306) - you deserved it (5101)

On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: