Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Offline (the 06/04/2014 at 4:49am) | Search for a member
About SydneyGrey : Hi! I love this blog and find it hilarious! My friend introduced it to me after I got mad at him for laughing at other people's misery. Hahaha. Well I'm laughing now too! So other than i LOVE acting, singing, dancing, and just overall performing!!! I LOVE cross country! my life is literally theatre, xc, school, and thats it!!! (u might think its sad but i enjoy every minute of it!) Im VERY protective of my loved ones and will beat someone up if they mess w/ them! :) I am 100% anti-bully for personal reasons (don't ask, i wont tell) Oh and I love disney and food and being me! I'm a sophomore! And I'm single! :) never had a bf/been kissed. yeah that's it BYE! just FYI I'm a total 100% dorky nerd!!!! Haha I just don't look like one though (I hope ;) )
Also I don't have a kik, fb, etc.. U can message me through FML though! I don't bite but don't even bother asking for pics! I will NOT send any!!!! I will tell u to F off instead!
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, my mother and I were discussing how we couldn't believe it's been nearly a year since my dad died. Not paying attention, my husband absentmindedly added, "Time flies when you're having fun." FML
Today, I was having dinner at a long-time friend's place. In a matter of 15 minutes, her mom had managed to establish unequivocally that three kinds of people were ruining the world: vegetarians, atheists and homosexuals. I'm all three rolled into one. She knows that. FML
Today, I was in a training about the newest changes in CPR. The trainer was discussing chest compression techniques and said she prefers "good, fast, hard pumping." I was the only one who snickered out loud, drawing several annoyed looks from the other trainees. I'm a 45-year-old doctor. FML
Today, my eldest daughter has 'officially' removed herself from our family and will no longer communicate with any of us. Apparently it's my fault that her younger sister is having a baby before her, and she can't be part of a family that 'treats her so unfairly'. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to start a Facebook chat with a guy I really like. It went so well, and he even agreed to hang out sometime. Seconds after we finished our conversation, he changed his status to: "Desperate bitches really piss me off." FML
Today, I helped my buddy write a sweet love letter to his girlfriend. After reading it, she dumped him for being an "Edward Cullen wannabe", and when my girlfriend found out, she dumped me for "cheating" on her by writing the letter in the first place. FML
Today, my sister backed out of my wedding because it was becoming too much about me. After I begged her to reconsider, I had no choice but to pick a new bridesmaid. When my new bridesmaid posted on Facebook how excited she was, my sister commented, "See, you made HER feel special." FML
Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML
Today, I confessed to losing my wife's engagement ring, and replacing it with a lookalike months ago. My wife also confessed that her actual engagement ring was locked in the safe, and the one I lost had been a fake. I've been paying the replacement off on my credit card for 6 months. FML
Today, I got a call from the police. Apparently my son tried robbing a teenage couple, but wound up getting his ass beat by both of them. I don't know what's worse, that my 32-year-old son is a criminal, or that he got it handed to him by 15-year-olds. FML
Tuesday 22 July 2014