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SychoticFML

Offline (the 01/27/2014 at 6:29am) | Search for a member

SychoticFML

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 51
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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I agree, their lives suck

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SychoticFML's favorite FMLs

Today, I got in a minor car accident because my mom had to check how many likes her last photo on Instagram had while driving. FML

#21217675
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37746) - you deserved it (3249)

On 07/22/2014 at 8:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my psycho neighbor finished building a cannon. An honest-to-god, on-wheels, could-be-on-a-pirate-ship cannon. And now he's testing it in the forest by my house. I'm pretty scared for my life, to be honest. FML

#21171119
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40070) - you deserved it (4272)

On 06/11/2014 at 4:36pm - misc - by ldrik1 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

#21082455
399 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41030) - you deserved it (7744)

On 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm - kids - by ashamed father (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

#20961988
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42732) - you deserved it (17413)

On 11/18/2013 at 10:26am - intimacy - by flavored (woman) - United States

Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML

#20640404
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62758) - you deserved it (13775)

On 05/04/2013 at 3:22am - kids - by prostitott -

Today, four days after our fridge-freezer broke down, my husband staggered home with three bags of ham. He drunkenly bought it with most of what little money we have, so now not only is our food budget gone, we also have a metric cunt-load of ham, and nowhere to store it. FML

#20548229
166 comments

Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML

#19352692
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19598) - you deserved it (3360)

On 03/26/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Mandy - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend out to a nice restaurant for our anniversary. Mid-way through the meal, a guy at the table across left for the restroom. My girlfriend reached over and swiped the guy's wallet from the table. My gonads went AWOL, and I couldn't even bring myself to call her out on it. FML

#19222204
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8187) - you deserved it (24038)

On 03/05/2012 at 5:55pm - misc - by mark (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

#18667019
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31259) - you deserved it (7605)

On 12/31/2011 at 7:51pm - misc - by thathurt (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was slammed onto my car, thrown on the ground, and arrested for outstanding warrants from 1979. I was born in 1992. FML

#16449288
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65158) - you deserved it (3599)

On 06/01/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by aarone23 - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML

#12449255
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31293) - you deserved it (3715)

On 08/11/2010 at 5:19am - health - by Thepunchline (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11523) - you deserved it (36679)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was doing homework in my room when my roommate started meowing all of a sudden. Not only was he meowing, he started to make loud cat noises that resembled a cat being run over by a car. He's gonna be my roommate for the rest of the year. FML

#6646444
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26489) - you deserved it (2872)

On 12/07/2009 at 3:54am - animals - by SeeMeInTheDark (man) - United States (Maryland)



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