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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I found out that my boyfriend is extremely jealous of a stuffed toy that sits on my bed, all because it gets to 'sleep in the same bed as me and he doesn't.' Now, whenever he comes over, he throws it at the wall, death glares at it, then gets up and kicks it under my bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29909) - you deserved it (8901)
Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which has an oddly-placed window, the direct sunlight has caused the left side of my face to become significantly darker than the right. Just call me Harvey Dent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20787) - you deserved it (2461)
On 02/11/2011 at 1:15pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56402) - you deserved it (4916)
On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23132) - you deserved it (14876) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, my friend commented on my short skirt and, thinking she was being funny, tried to pull it down. I quickly moved away, causing it to come off in her hands. My shocked scream attracted the attention of at least a dozen bystanders. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13962) - you deserved it (4914)
On 12/30/2010 at 1:21pm - misc - by glam300 - United Kingdom
Today, I gave my ex-girlfriend two concert tickets to show her I still care about her and want to win her back. She sold them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9142) - you deserved it (27023)
On 12/16/2010 at 12:51am - love - by LD619 - United States (California)
Today, I was in the bathroom in a rush to get ready. Without thinking, I put hand soap on my toothbrush. I didn't notice until it was already in my mouth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7352) - you deserved it (16123)
On 12/15/2010 at 5:32pm - health - by captfml (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50044) - you deserved it (3526)
On 12/02/2010 at 8:20am - love - by mrdentist -
Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11766) - you deserved it (16439)
On 11/25/2010 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was helping an older lady return her previously bought items to customer service. As she walked away and said "Thanks," I tried to say "You're welcome" and "No problem" at the same time. I ended up saying "Your problem". She scowled at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13441) - you deserved it (5559)
On 11/24/2010 at 4:52am - work - by romedizzle (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I tripped on a step that said "Watch your step." Two hours later, I hit my head on a sign that said "Mind your head." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19776) - you deserved it (9411)
On 11/13/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I complained to my boss about how my printer wasn't printing colored ink even though I had just installed a new cartridge yesterday. Upon investigation, she noted that I forgot to take off the protection sticker from the cartridge. Good job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3288) - you deserved it (15941)
On 11/10/2010 at 7:26pm - work - by MrandMrsRendon20 - United States (Texas)
Today, I tried opening a can for the first time using a manual can opener. I tried for a half hour to open a can of ravioli, mutilating the can in the process. Only after watching five Youtube videos on how to use a manual can opener did I notice the pull-tab on the top of the ravioli can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4835) - you deserved it (41364)
On 11/10/2010 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was sitting at a traffic light when a cute girl appeared at the side of the road. I sat and watched her until she had crossed, when I realised that I had missed the light. A large queue of cars had built up behind me, yet none of them used their horn because I was driving my police car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5082) - you deserved it (32450)
On 11/10/2010 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (York)
Today, my cat learned how to flush the toilet while I was in the shower. His transformation from cute kitten to pure evil entity is now complete. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22617) - you deserved it (3800)
On 11/08/2010 at 5:55am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)
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