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About Swagmaster3000 : I really don't know how you found me considering I don't post anything but here I am. If you're up for scintillating conversations about walruses, the ankylosaurus, Pokémon, most pop culture or Doctor Who here I am. If not I probably serve you no purpose I'm really not all that good with social skills I'm sorry. I may or may not be fun to talk to? So you might as well try I suppose. Or not. That's cool too.
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Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML
Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML
Friday 31 July 2015