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SwaggerMelon

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SwaggerMelon

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 February 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 995
  • Number of comments : 117
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 10 posted

About SwaggerMelon : No description available.

SwaggerMelon's page activity

Visits<b>whatOu</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:03pm<b>RandomPrius</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 10:27am<b>xDochx</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 4:46pm<b>LifeSurvivor</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 9:42pm<b>brubakers</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 2:29pm<b>WeiXinLun</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 11:26am<b>sabrinalynn22</b> - the 12/14/2013 at 7:38pm<b>bluerhhajfk</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 6:05pm<b>Aspireworks</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 8:59pm<b>itscare1217</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 7:48pm<b>MeltedBrain</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 3:03am<b>mintyowlgirl</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 9:20pm<b>Sockturtle</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 2:03am<b>ironman007</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 9:23am<b>bananagoat</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 10:32am<b>dorworters</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 9:53pm<b>Zeus1070</b> - the 01/29/2013 at 12:59am<b>hassi128</b> - the 11/24/2012 at 11:51pm

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SwaggerMelon's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

#20584918
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50514) - you deserved it (10850)

On 04/11/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

#20457945
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28719) - you deserved it (3150)

On 01/13/2013 at 10:00pm - misc - by anon - United States (Ohio)

Today, a homeless man asked me for some money to eat. He ate the five dollars I gave him. FML

#20161582
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24720) - you deserved it (3673)

On 11/13/2012 at 6:34am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

#20160393
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25245) - you deserved it (7548)

On 11/12/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by mm (woman) - United Kingdom (Warrington)

Today, after eight months of unemployment, I finally started at my new night job. Shortly after walking in, my boss came up behind me, whispered "hooorse dicksss" in my ear, and walked off without another word. I am terrified. FML

#20094121
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21659) - you deserved it (1752)

On 09/29/2012 at 8:11pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my laptop got hit by a Trojan. Not the malware, but a used condom thrown from a car driving past as I sat on a street bench. FML

#20091945
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32475) - you deserved it (2373)

On 09/28/2012 at 4:24am - intimacy - by iNearlyHurled - United States

Today, I wanted to take a bubble bath with the jets in the bath that I haven't used in years. When I got in, it took me a while to realize that the jets had squirted out slime and a family of unidentifiable bugs that have probably been living there for years. FML

#20060052
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22098) - you deserved it (8263)

On 09/06/2012 at 2:38am - misc - by juliannamelissa - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

#20043967
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29368) - you deserved it (2473)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at work in a nursing home, I had to kill imaginary dogs in the lunch room, because they were evil and trying to eat everyone. This started with just one person seeing them, to all 30 of them screaming and freaking out. I spent 45 minutes killing imaginary dogs. FML

#19983789
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26947) - you deserved it (2085)

On 07/25/2012 at 5:05pm - work - by justlittleoldme - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I put my ironing board away in the bathroom. After closing the door, I heard a loud noise. The board had opened up while falling over, taking up the width of the room. I can't open the door. FML

#19533059
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22687) - you deserved it (3262) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/26/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Magicgwen - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that when people in my apartment complex warn their kids about strangers, they use me as the example. FML

#19348901
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23296) - you deserved it (3554)

On 03/26/2012 at 12:55am - misc - by iamnotalawyer (man) - United States (California)

Today, I gave my grandparents my old cell to use since they needed an upgrade. I thought I had deleted everything until I received a text from my grandmother. It was a vagina shot I had taken for my fiancé with a message that said "You need to wear more makeup". FML

#19158287
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9399) - you deserved it (31692)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by ashleynicolle (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, in the spirit of Christmas, I let a spider live in my room. I normally kill them, because I'm scared of waking up with one on my face. I woke up with it on my face. FML

#18633962
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29615) - you deserved it (21222)

On 12/28/2011 at 12:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I was over at a friend's house for a party. I was trying to strike up a conversation with one of my cute guy friends, so I showed him this funny picture of me that my friend took. His reply was "Hahahaa those Fatbooth pictures are hilarious!" It wasn't a Fatbooth picture. FML

#18162827
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31549) - you deserved it (6547)

On 11/05/2011 at 7:45am - misc - by sophhiee - United States (Maryland)



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