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SwaggCapone

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SwaggCapone

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 August 1985 (29 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 466
  • Number of comments : 161
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SwaggCapone : I'm me. Don't like me? I don't care

SwaggCapone's page activity

Visits<b>mcpoople</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 5:54am<b>TheNinjaOfAsia</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 11:32am<b>cwrocker</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 10:50pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 3:37pm<b>arraryOutOfBound</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 1:25am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 8:15pm<b>lilpsyco</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 10:24pm<b>DJisHere11</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 12:04am<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/25/2013 at 11:10pm<b>Booda_Shun</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 4:37pm<b>Evgeny2222</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 3:19pm<b>iammeorami</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 6:43pm<b>FluxPavilion</b> - the 09/10/2013 at 3:19pm<b>katoetomato</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 1:36pm<b>zeropsych</b> - the 09/09/2013 at 1:11am<b>bregan9735</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:58pm<b>iAmLauRawr</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 12:44am<b>bfsd42</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 3:02pm

SwaggCapone's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SwaggCapone's badges

SwaggCapone's favorite FMLs

Today, at my boyfriend's brother's house, I desperately needed to poop. After finishing my business, I realized the toilet wouldn't flush. I had to pull my poop out, wrap it in TP and make an excuse to go outside to throw it in a bush. The neighbor was watching. FML

#20874714
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41132) - you deserved it (11035)

On 09/09/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by heyhijello - United States (California)

Today, while at the zoo, I found out that the rhinos there can pee backwards, while standing directly behind one. FML

#20874616
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38190) - you deserved it (4053)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:51pm - animals - by Are you kidding me? - United States (Kansas)

Today, at Walmart, a woman kept screaming at her husband for the most ridiculous reasons. My friend snickered that she must be on her period, prompting her to whirl around, storm over, and slap the hell out of me, thinking I was the one who said it. FML

#20870447
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50564) - you deserved it (3951)

On 09/06/2013 at 5:42pm - health - by what's a rimjob between friends? (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I read a seemingly serious article online about giving your smartphone some extra charge by putting it in the microwave for one minute. My phone is now fried. FML

#20864782
518 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17868) - you deserved it (128657)

On 09/02/2013 at 4:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, I forgot to shut off some pumps before closing the main valves that run to them. Several sirens soon started blaring at a deafening level. I'm new here and nobody else is around. I don't know how to shut the sirens off. FML

#20844606
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36484) - you deserved it (6632)

On 08/19/2013 at 12:00pm - work - by oops (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, after an argument with my wife, I stormed out of our bedroom through the sliding doors to the balcony. Only there was no balcony, because it still hasn't been replaced yet. I'm now laid-up in hospital. FML

#20843350
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38264) - you deserved it (15055)

On 08/18/2013 at 4:13pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52110) - you deserved it (3116)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

#20841455
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44966) - you deserved it (7362)

On 08/17/2013 at 6:52am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I submitted my big assignment to my teacher at 1:55pm. The deadline was 2pm. She rejected it, because her watch read a few minutes after 2pm, and she maintains that the time on her watch is the "real" time. FML

#20840255
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44406) - you deserved it (11606)

On 08/16/2013 at 12:04pm - misc - by WatchOut - Singapore

Today, my 14-year-old daughter convinced my son that when he was born, he was actually born as a girl, but we wanted a boy so bad we had his gender changed. Now he wants to change back to a girl because now he doesn't feel right as a boy. Last year, she got her other brother to cross dress. FML

#20832766
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49247) - you deserved it (5203)

On 08/11/2013 at 8:58pm - kids - by mydaughterisdisturbed - United States (Indiana)

Today, I enlisted in the military. My dad now finds it necessary to act like a drill sergeant. This includes yelling at me everywhere we go to prepare me for basic training. Training begins in four months. FML

#20830066
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41595) - you deserved it (6296)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mum picked up a bunch of tissues that were scattered around my room. She examined them, then asked me to stop wasting her potential grandchildren. FML

#20825949
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49417) - you deserved it (40424)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Egypt

Today, I was feeling down because I always think that I'm overweight. My boyfriend tried to prove me wrong by lifting me up. I threw his back out. FML

#20823726
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45724) - you deserved it (9055)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:01pm - health - by GirlfriendsAreBadForYourBack - United States (New York)

Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML

#20823686
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57556) - you deserved it (14338)

On 08/06/2013 at 11:19am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arkansas)



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