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SuperWasian

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SuperWasian

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  • Number of visits : 328
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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SuperWasian's page activity

Visits<b>Shandrahagerman</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 12:30pm

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SuperWasian's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned the only job that actually wants me is as a peanut butter factory worker. I've been unemployed for 9 months. I'm also allergic to nuts. FML

#15931079
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30609) - you deserved it (3310)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:49am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my bird learned to mimic my fire alarm. It proved it to me at 3 am. FML

#15341200
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29488) - you deserved it (4191)

On 03/16/2011 at 8:12pm - animals - by MacGrouber (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20300) - you deserved it (32156)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

#14794923
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36342) - you deserved it (4801)

On 02/01/2011 at 8:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was tidying my room when my gran came in and offered to help. I said I didn't need any, but she started going through it anyway. She found a tube of "Very Cherry" lube and asked what it was. I subtly tore off the label and tried to convince her it was a face mask. She's taken it to try it out tonight. FML

#13394312
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24406) - you deserved it (8115)

On 10/10/2010 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Dilly - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was bringing the garbage cans inside and noticed one felt a little heavy. I opened it, only to find a raccoon. A very angry raccoon. FML

#13094765
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28822) - you deserved it (2455)

On 09/18/2010 at 2:31am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned explosive diarrhea is real. I felt it coming and dashed into our supermarket. 10 feet in, liquid poo started spewing down my pants legs. 150 feet to go. I ran. It ran. They watched. After 15 minutes of cleaning, I slunk out. Now, I have to find a new market, maybe a new town. FML

#6433881
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38787) - you deserved it (2952)

On 11/24/2009 at 6:44am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

#6207441
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30637) - you deserved it (3131)

On 11/08/2009 at 2:26am - animals - by birdbath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

#1183815
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35591) - you deserved it (92983)

On 04/21/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML

#226271
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26708) - you deserved it (36973)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had sex with a girl who cried out as she came "Forgive me Lord! Forgive me Lord!" FML

#552
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51854) - you deserved it (6306)

On 12/19/2008 at 11:05am - intimacy - by chicochico - Sent from mobile version



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