SuicideSmurf

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Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 8:36pm)

SuicideSmurf

1Fucked!

SuicideSmurfSuicideSmurf
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 July 1999 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2613
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About SuicideSmurf : wassup😎
kik me - suicidesmurf33🌚
you're great👐
oppression is disgusting😷
be my friend👭

SuicideSmurf's page activity

Visits<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 2:12am<b>marinade18</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 11:16am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 1:05pm<b>BTLoser96</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:54am<b>baawall</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 1:56pm<b>juice_33</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 11:26am<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:55pm<b>chr1sF</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 7:32am<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:52am<b>cheeology</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 1:03pm<b>Alexxandre</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 9:28am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 1:59am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 10:15pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 9:49pm<b>Joshoa123</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 1:06am<b>Mons</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:56pm<b>DBJ99</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 1:56pm<b>christophbak</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:08am

Fucked!<b>Medhi</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 12:02am

SuicideSmurf's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of SuicideSmurf's badges

SuicideSmurf's favorite FMLs

Today, after years of difficulty, I finally found the perfect shade of foundation that matches my ultra-pale complexion. It's called "Death Flesh." FML

by 2pale / 11/01/2015 at 1:22pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while reading the paper I saw a picture of a guy I really like that I met online. The picture is in the obituaries. No wonder he hasn't called. FML

by kubbyp / 04/03/2014 at 5:22pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, the girl I've been dating dumped me after she found out I'm originally from Alabama. Apparently she doesn't want to date someone from a "foreign country". We both live in Michigan. FML

by Anonymous / 03/28/2014 at 3:23pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was stuck in the elevator for almost two hours. Where was the elevator mechanic? Next to me in the elevator. FML

by ClaustrophobicNightmares / 03/28/2014 at 4:42am / Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad) / Work

Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML

by Anonymous / 01/04/2014 at 6:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML

by Kayak / 12/29/2013 at 6:23pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my daughter lighting candles around one of her friends, who'd fallen asleep while her other friends chanted something in a different language. They still won't tell me what they were doing. FML

by Anonymous / 12/22/2013 at 10:36am / United States / Kids

Today, my class was interrupted by flowers, balloons and chocolates. Then he sang to me a song he wrote himself. This was all for our one-year anniversary. It probably would have been the best day of my life... if I knew who he was. FML

by romance sucks. / 12/18/2013 at 4:20pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my teenage daughter found out that she's pregnant, but insists she's still a virgin. Who does she think knocked her up? God? FML

by Anonymous / 12/17/2013 at 4:57pm / Egypt / Kids

Today, while trying to break up with my girlfriend, I somehow ended up begging her not to break up with me. I'm still not sure how that happened. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 6:38pm / Bangladesh / Love

Today, my elderly neighbor along with our community church's priest came to my house and demanded to "give them the girl". The girl is my 3-year-old daughter, who has natural born red irises and is photo-sensitive. And yes, we are also Romanian. FML

by OakStake / 12/08/2013 at 5:07pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

by Anonymous / 12/08/2013 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML

by bella / 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my 6-year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

by john doe / 12/07/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my wife made me a Sex Rewards Chart, where I get points by doing chores and such, and 50 points gets me some action. She refuses to even look at me if I haven't earned the points, and is contemplating sleeping alone in the guest room until I earn more points. FML

by feiedbutter / 12/07/2013 at 9:55am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy