SuddenDeath5

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Offline (the 01/13/2016 at 6:13pm)

SuddenDeath5

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4760
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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SuddenDeath5's page activity

Visits<b>touch_the_sky_77</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:10pm<b>MissEris</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 10:56pm<b>hippodankamus</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 4:25pm<b>UnknownDemon1406</b> - the 10/14/2013 at 7:51am<b>Harshmellow</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:40pm<b>Carrotop12</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 7:15pm<b>Masterbator</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 5:43pm<b>Sp4de</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 4:48pm<b>vote4paco</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 3:44pm<b>lz_mordan</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 1:45pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 10/02/2013 at 4:32am<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 7:51pm<b>bmba94</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 1:47am<b>Fluffydemise</b> - the 09/19/2013 at 3:45pm<b>chachochach</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 12:18am<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 10:27pm

SuddenDeath5's FML badges

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SuddenDeath5's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that if you accidentally step on your boss's dog's tail, yes, you can get fired. But not because you stepped on the dog's tail. You didn't say sorry. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2013 at 9:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I set up a motion-activated sprinkler to drench the neighborhood kids who have been ding dong ditching me for years. Because they cannot get close enough to ring the doorbell, they decided to start egging me instead. FML

by Kyle / 12/03/2013 at 1:09am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I arrived at work six minutes late due to heavily congested traffic. This is just two days after my boss put out a memo saying that anyone who's late to work from then until the new year will have their holiday bonus pay forfeited. FML

by aaannnddd there goes my boner / 11/28/2013 at 5:03pm / United Kingdom / Work

Today, my dad is forcing me to go shopping with him tomorrow for Black Friday, because he's convinced that my martial arts classes will come in handy when people "inevitably" try to beat the shit out of us in the rush for cheap stuff. FML

by fuck me / 11/28/2013 at 2:13pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally password-protected my phone, to protect it from my friends' favorite game: stealing it and sending stupid texts, and hijacking my Facebook. They quickly found a new game. My phone is now locked for 24 hours due to too many attempts to guess the password. FML

by Anonymous / 11/25/2013 at 12:06pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taken to the principal's office and bitched out about the dangerous weapon I brought to school. The "weapon" was a pocket fan. FML

by Anonymous / 11/22/2013 at 4:57pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML

by awkwardpaul / 11/22/2013 at 5:18am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Love

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

by oops999 / 11/19/2013 at 2:46pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I got an angry call to the phone shop where I work. The caller demanded that we give him his money back. His reason? He said he'd been tricked because his phone got ruined by water "even though he was using the waterproof application". FML

Today, I was offered a job that pays far more than I expected, being a high school senior. My parents decided they aren't letting me take the job, saying I should enjoy my childhood. They're also not paying for my college, which is why I was looking for work in the first place. FML

by Remy / 11/16/2013 at 6:39pm / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I tried to put the little girl I babysit in timeout for lying to me. I was about to sit her down when she made a mad dash for the basement stairs, slipped on the wood floor, and fell down them. She told her parents and everyone at the ER that I had thrown her down the stairs. FML

by little_star78 / 11/13/2013 at 6:08am / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, a drunken customer blindsided me after I told him I would not be giving him a free drink after I watched him put his own hair in it. FML

by ShakenNotStirred / 11/11/2013 at 3:18am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, after doing vigorous chores all day with my girlfriend, her mom came and paid us each $100. My girlfriend cried and threw a fit because she said they were her chores, so she deserves all the money. FML

by Go away / 11/10/2013 at 3:03am / United States (Iowa) / Money

Today, my husband and I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing the matter again. Later on, he made us lasagna. The moment I swallowed the first mouthful, he smirked, then started snickering uncontrollably. What the fuck did he do to my food? FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2013 at 1:34pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

by MsConfusedd / 10/27/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Miscellaneous