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Stroke_Her_Ace

Offline (yesterday at 5:05am) | Search for a member

Stroke_Her_Ace

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 14 March 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1474
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Stroke_Her_Ace : Derrickhand - My office has a better view.

Stroke_Her_Ace's page activity

Visits<b>timnealprice</b> - yesterday at 1:45am<b>Cadillac_kid_15</b> - the 06/12/2015 at 11:15pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 5:06pm<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 4:18pm<b>bobbymcjagger</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 2:53pm<b>swmmrrnr</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 5:55pm<b>HannaMD</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 4:29pm<b>Imakebadmistakes</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 11:59pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 9:23pm<b>Lanker</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 8:05pm<b>NotAUser</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 7:37pm<b>CelticKing</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 2:14pm<b>Marine6297</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 2:47pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 5:53pm<b>xRake</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 8:58am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 3:26am<b>Mojo0608</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 1:53pm<b>trent41286</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 7:23am

Stroke_Her_Ace's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of Stroke_Her_Ace's badges

Stroke_Her_Ace's favorite FMLs

Today, I was watching last week's episode of The Walking Dead with my girlfriend. When the gang leader explained the rules of the group to Daryl, I reached over, grabbed my girlfriend's boobs and yelled, "Claimed!" She shot back, "Yeah, they are. But not by you." FML

#21099560
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41551) - you deserved it (17873)

On 03/29/2014 at 5:57pm - love - by the other guy? (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I told my boyfriend the dentist said my blood pressure was high. He was more interested in the fact that the dentist took my blood pressure than my blood pressure being high. FML

#21095607
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33058) - you deserved it (9482)

On 03/24/2014 at 10:11pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

#20605608
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57333) - you deserved it (7098)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm - kids - by reyoflight (man) - Brazil (Rio de Janeiro)

Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML

#20584129
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46251) - you deserved it (11866)

On 04/10/2013 at 8:45pm - kids - by Me - United States (California)

Today, I found out why I find damp spots on my favorite jacket. I appears that my dog often becomes very intimate with it. FML

#18827705
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29956) - you deserved it (3067)

On 01/16/2012 at 7:33pm - animals - by Cathy - United States

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML

#18772275
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14766) - you deserved it (33886)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried exercising. My whole house shook. FML

#18691343
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26594) - you deserved it (13398)

On 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dogs broke through our electric fence, one of whom managed to get his collar off. I picked it up and, without thinking, went across the fence line. I screamed like a chihuahua being run over by a bulldozer. FML

#18378000
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11414) - you deserved it (35082)

On 11/28/2011 at 6:54pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my 12 year-old daughter asked me where her scrotum is. FML

#18139418
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30852) - you deserved it (5341)

On 11/02/2011 at 4:18pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my friend and I gave our numbers to some guys at a bar. Twenty minutes after we had left, we got a call. We excitedly answered the phone, only to hear the guy ask, "So are you the fat one or the ugly one?" FML

#17413127
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30832) - you deserved it (6892)

On 08/08/2011 at 11:43pm - misc - by me - United States

Today, I was doing swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your girlfriend's problems! Swim, bitch!" FML

#17233165
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43120) - you deserved it (5617) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/23/2011 at 7:52pm - love - by mathii - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to see a movie I'd been waiting months for. A couple of women sat down a few rows in front of me with five infants. The infants cried and wailed throughout. I'm not sure I have any idea what was actually said in any of the dialogue. FML

Today, my girlfriend put a paper bag over my head while we had sex. Her reason? Because she thinks she is so good in bed she was worried I'd hyperventilate due to all the excitement. Instead I fainted due to lack of oxygen after three minutes. FML

#17215427
328 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39790) - you deserved it (9975)

On 07/22/2011 at 9:38am - intimacy - by quickfingers100 - United Kingdom

Today, I lost my virginity to the woman of my dreams. I finished before entering. I'm 28 years old. FML

#17211939
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45026) - you deserved it (11057)

On 07/22/2011 at 1:00am - intimacy - by James - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was given a DUI while in the Whataburger drive thru. FML

#17139539
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11147) - you deserved it (42078)

On 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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