About Storme : Hyperactive teenage girl. Likes pineapples. Planning to take over the world.
Storme's FML badges
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.
Storme's favorite FMLs
Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML
by bad samaritan / 10/22/2012 at 11:51pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by musicthief / 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by thebeachisthatway / 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML
by Anonymous / 10/22/2012 at 6:54am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Work
Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML
by smdh / 10/21/2012 at 10:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Tanner / 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by cbad / 01/30/2012 at 10:27am / United States / Health
by blondie101 / 12/09/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML
by shootme / 11/13/2011 at 5:46pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
by devinchi / 11/11/2011 at 3:42am / United States / Health
by myfamilyisodd / 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids
by FullOfNick / 09/10/2011 at 3:11am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, my dad nearly had a head-on collision with another car, but I grabbed the wheel at the last second, potentially saving both our lives. He spent the rest of the car trip pissed at me because I'd "interfered" with his driving. FML
by laurlaur / 08/05/2011 at 5:47pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML
by Anonymous / 08/03/2011 at 1:03pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say…
- Today, while having hot sex with my boyfriend, I was experiencing my very first orgasm. Right when… Today, I was sitting on the bus when a good looking girl accidentally brushed her ass up against my… Today, my grandmother bought a Shakeweight, an exercise tool which, basically, simulates a hand-job…