About Storme : Hyperactive teenage girl. Likes pineapples. Planning to take over the world.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Tweet, tweet
You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.
Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22810) - you deserved it (951)
On 10/22/2012 at 11:51pm - work - by bad samaritan (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I saw my music teacher, who I considered one of my role-models, on TV. Too bad it was because she'd robbed a church. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13237) - you deserved it (1020)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:51pm - misc - by musicthief - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22263) - you deserved it (3161)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while at a psychiatric hospital working as a student nurse, I discovered one of the patients had developed an unhealthy obsession for me. He was admitted for stalking and abusing a girl who looked just like me. It's only my first week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17650) - you deserved it (993)
On 10/22/2012 at 6:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, my dad asked me to clean the trash on our acreage. I was cleaning around the tree line when I came across a particularly heavy bag. I ran inside to ask my dad for help moving it. He looked inside the bag to see what it could be. It was a human body. Someone had thrown it over our fence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48436) - you deserved it (1782)
On 10/22/2012 at 3:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11425) - you deserved it (825)
On 10/21/2012 at 10:52pm - misc - by smdh - United States
Today, while my mother's blind friend was waiting in our kitchen for my mom to come home, I thought it would be funny to talk to her in the nude. Turns out she's only blind in one eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4144) - you deserved it (36206)
On 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, I woke up super glued to the toilet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20150) - you deserved it (7072)
On 04/06/2012 at 10:26pm - misc - by Tanner - United States (Oregon)
Today, I cut my finger with a plastic knife while demonstrating that you can't cut yourself with a plastic knife. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8717) - you deserved it (30703)
On 01/30/2012 at 10:27am - health - by cbad (woman) - United States
Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8557) - you deserved it (66082)
On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States
Today, like every day, I used my phone while taking a dump. As I reached for some toilet paper to wipe myself, my sister pounded on the door for me to hurry up. I yelled "Fine," and without realizing it, wiped myself with my phone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12498) - you deserved it (39335)
Today, my buddy told me he was going to get an HIV test at the health department. Without thinking, I told him to "think positive". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22392) - you deserved it (5501)
On 11/11/2011 at 3:42am - health - by devinchi (man) - United States
Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21904) - you deserved it (3446)
On 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm - kids - by myfamilyisodd (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12726) - you deserved it (27022)
On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my dad nearly had a head-on collision with another car, but I grabbed the wheel at the last second, potentially saving both our lives. He spent the rest of the car trip pissed at me because I'd "interfered" with his driving. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24067) - you deserved it (329)
On 08/05/2011 at 5:47pm - health - by laurlaur - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
