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StoicCloud

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StoicCloud

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  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 January 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4156
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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StoicCloud's page activity

Visits<b>cainightroad</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 6:02pm<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 10/24/2014 at 8:15pm<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 8:44am<b>Ryiah</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 1:35pm<b>sonshadsil94</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 11:06am<b>lovelyvampire</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 9:57pm<b>turtles_love</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 6:39pm<b>MegaHAMX</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 11:31pm<b>Brainnnnz</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 4:40pm<b>Flendre_scarlet</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 3:45pm<b>Princessuuke</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:52pm<b>Black_Knight80</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 8:02am<b>Trollx</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 10:36am<b>wilburhp</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 10:24am<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 02/11/2014 at 12:03am<b>patchesOhoolihan</b> - the 01/16/2014 at 7:13pm<b>alibear7</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 11:53pm<b>Verst</b> - the 12/23/2013 at 4:32am

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StoicCloud's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at my boyfriend's grandmother's house meeting her for the first time. I excused myself to the restroom and as I walked out of the room I heard her say, "You could do a lot better. She's fat." Then I heard my boyfriend reply, "I know." FML

#20511747
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46308) - you deserved it (5110)

On 02/18/2013 at 2:09am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML

#20510258
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22126) - you deserved it (18689)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend and I both developed food poisoning from last night's sushi. Our apartment has one bathroom. FML

#20503655
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27301) - you deserved it (2889)

On 02/12/2013 at 1:43pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

#20502782
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32962) - you deserved it (2429)

On 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm - misc - by Target - United States

Today, I found a cup full of urine in the bathtub. No one in my family knows where it came from. This is the second time it's happened. FML

#20498051
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29207) - you deserved it (2292)

On 02/08/2013 at 10:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

#20497837
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57585) - you deserved it (10896)

On 02/08/2013 at 2:13am - intimacy - by mydadsgonnakillme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I desperately needed to pee, so I decided to confront my anxiety issues and use a public toilet. I opened the lid, only to see several huge, rancid floaters staring back at me. I had an attack, started sobbing, and pissed myself on the way home. Never again. FML

#20489333
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28005) - you deserved it (8483)

On 02/01/2013 at 6:53pm - misc - by VMV (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I took my new girlfriend to meet my grandmother. We were drinking coffee when my gran leaned to one side and let out a huge fart. Proud of herself, she added, "That one didn't pay his rent on time!" Coffee came out of my girlfriend's nose. FML

#20484951
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32171) - you deserved it (4564) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/29/2013 at 2:56pm - love - by jay ze punk - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, after months of lacking intimacy in our relationship, my girlfriend decided to spice things up by covering her naked body with whipped cream. Except, we didn't have any in the fridge, so instead I had to politely lick shaving cream off of her while fighting the urge to vomit. FML

#20482358
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49439) - you deserved it (13960)

On 01/28/2013 at 12:03am - intimacy - by yourmainman (man) - Canada

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

#20482313
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36999) - you deserved it (2419)

On 01/27/2013 at 11:36pm - kids - by andy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a text from an unknown number saying, "You shouldn't be eating that." I was eating a piece of chocolate, cheating on my diet. FML

#20480667
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31650) - you deserved it (17462)

On 01/27/2013 at 12:38am - misc - by LucidNightmare - United States (Colorado)

Today, a pregnant woman got on the bus. There were no free seats, so I stood up to give her mine. An obese man pushed past her, waddled over, and oozed into my seat. I said it was for the pregnant lady. He called me a "sexist bitch" and claimed he needed it more. FML

#20478664
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44323) - you deserved it (2473)

On 01/25/2013 at 8:24pm - misc - by protoplasm stole my seat (woman) - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I played an intense paintball match, with me and my friends versus my boyfriend and his buddies. When we won, my boyfriend went mental and said he only lost because of "lag". When I pointed out we weren't in a video game, he reacted by firing a paintball straight into my chest. FML

#20478409
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37343) - you deserved it (5440)

On 01/25/2013 at 5:19pm - health - by LagSwitchFTW (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend complimented me on my ass. Before I could say thanks, she continued by commenting that she wouldn't mind "breaking it in". FML

#20478275
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35076) - you deserved it (5942)

On 01/25/2013 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by great (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, feeling lonely after my recent breakup, I put on my nicest clothes and went out clubbing with a few friends. I brought a guy back to my place, and we got intimate. It was going well, until he took off my push-up bra, then panicked and drunkenly asked, "Where'd they go?!" FML

#20477055
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25134) - you deserved it (48193)

On 01/24/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by chase (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)



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