StitchnLilo

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Offline (the 09/09/2014 at 3:45pm)

StitchnLilo

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 17 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 929
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About StitchnLilo : Hi

StitchnLilo's page activity

Visits<b>Booksawhi</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 6:08pm<b>mrlawlor7777</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 11:23pm<b>xanderzmommy</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 6:37pm<b>1915destroyer</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 6:29pm<b>Door_Productions</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:28am<b>jackskeleton</b> - the 02/21/2014 at 5:48pm<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 7:55pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 6:05am<b>Kain713</b> - the 10/29/2013 at 6:32pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 10:44pm<b>speechprincess</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 4:02pm<b>1992yoko</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 1:15am<b>legoking236</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 1:30pm<b>Random_kid0718</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 1:35pm<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 1:46pm<b>fml1365</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 8:54pm<b>shibeep</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 12:55am<b>holeyman</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 9:29pm

StitchnLilo's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of StitchnLilo's badges

StitchnLilo's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

by Uncircumcised Penis / 07/24/2012 at 5:51am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

by John / 06/30/2012 at 1:08am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

by whoslade / 06/28/2012 at 1:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML

by 16590 / 06/15/2012 at 6:13pm / Sweden / Transportation

Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML

by Anonymous / 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I found out how my parents met. They met at a mental hospital, where they were both being hospitalized. FML

by fail / 06/15/2012 at 11:36am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, I learned that if you're going to use vicks vapor rub for a cold, you should remember to wash your hands before changing your tampon. FML

by sickness_sucks / 06/15/2012 at 2:19am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, my face got intimate with several plywood boards, and I suffered lacerations and bruising. I told my friends I got the wounds from taking a few guys down in a bar fight. Now they're dragging me out into a rough part of town to give them "muscle" while they try to score some crack. FML

by Anonymous / 06/14/2012 at 4:59pm / United Kingdom (Croydon) / Health

Today, while talking to my girlfriend, the subject of Darth Vader came up. That's when she asked me, "Aren't Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker the same person?" I don't know what's worse, the fact that she asked me that, or the fact that I got upset over her lack of Star Wars knowledge. FML

by Nadaz / 04/05/2012 at 7:29am / United States (North Carolina) / Geek

Today, I went to the gas station, paid the clerk, and drove off without pumping any gas. FML

by ChevRooon / 01/26/2012 at 11:46pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my cat vomited violently. I can smell it but I can't find it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/15/2011 at 4:49pm / Australia (South Australia) / Animals

Today, I slipped and fell in mud while running from the car to inside to avoid getting wet in a torrential downpour. I was running from the limo, in my wedding dress, to the church for my wedding. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2011 at 12:26am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Love

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by a "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. And we continued to chat. FML

by IPityTheStool / 06/09/2011 at 9:22am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 12:42am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy