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SteffiTheSmile's favorite FMLs
Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML
by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:15pm / Belgium (Oost-Vlaanderen) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/26/2010 at 4:32pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 5:53pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by smallfrie32 / 11/23/2010 at 12:22am / Miscellaneous
by nicolette5785452 / 11/16/2010 at 10:34am / United States (Ohio) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/06/2010 at 12:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML
by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
by ohman / 10/02/2010 at 2:28am / Singapore / Love
by WTF?!?! / 09/08/2010 at 8:11pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/16/2010 at 7:05pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous90 / 07/24/2010 at 7:59pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Intimacy
Today, I've been dieting and working out trying to work towards some solid abs because I know my girlfriend digs that stuff. I've been miserable trying to achieve this goal, plus to make things even better while kissing today she grabbed my stomach and said "I just love your abs of... flab." FML
by AbFlab / 06/01/2010 at 12:35am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
by bleredoshia / 04/08/2010 at 12:27am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Kids
by pumpkinlover89 / 03/27/2010 at 4:26am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 03/09/2010 at 1:43am / Australia (Victoria) / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today my mom, bored lover of games and mysteries, bragged about outsmarting scammers by burning all…