This member hasn't filled in their description.
SteffiTheSmile's FML badges
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
SteffiTheSmile's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 09/01/2013 at 12:34pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML
by SplishSplash / 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm / United States / Intimacy
by itsellie27 / 08/30/2013 at 10:44am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health
Today, my mother yet again went on a long rant about how much of a loser I am as I have "never had boyfriend" and I'm 26. Truth is, I've been in the same relationship for over five years but it "doesn't count because he's black." FML
by Anonymous / 08/29/2013 at 8:48pm / United Kingdom / Love
by tallguy / 08/29/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. As I started getting close to having my first ever orgasm, I got extremely short of breath and started hyperventilating. His reaction was to cover my mouth to shut me up. FML
by Anonymous / 08/24/2013 at 6:31pm / Isle of Man / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/23/2013 at 7:30pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, at work, two teenage girls caused a huge scene and told me to get lost, after I asked if they needed any help. Their reasoning: they didn't want to be helped by "someone who doesn't have a thigh gap." FML
by Hannahb17 / 08/23/2013 at 6:21pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, my boyfriend and I were discussing sports injuries, and I mentioned that I pulled a muscle in my crotch last year. He snorted and called me a clueless idiot because according to him, "girls don't have crotches". He's a med student. I sense malpractice lawsuits in our future. FML
by fucking financial ruin / 08/23/2013 at 2:21pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Intimacy
by ANON / 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my 14-year-old daughter convinced my son that when he was born, he was actually born as a girl, but we wanted a boy so bad we had his gender changed. Now he wants to change back to a girl because now he doesn't feel right as a boy. Last year, she got her other brother to cross dress. FML
by mydaughterisdisturbed / 08/11/2013 at 8:58pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids
Today, this weird kid in class asked me on a date. He claims to be a werewolf. His excuse for not being able to turn into one? A "rare disease." His excuse for everyone rejecting him? "Friend-zoning bitches." I was the last resort even for a jackoff "nice guy" werewolf. FML
by WHAT A NICE GUY YOU ARE, SIR SHITSPAWN!!!1! / 08/09/2013 at 6:13pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Crouching Tiger, Hidden Retard / 08/06/2013 at 5:55pm / United States / Love
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
by Nick / 07/20/2013 at 3:37pm / United States (California) / Money