Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SteffiTheSmile

Online | Search for a member

SteffiTheSmile

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 25 December 1940 (73 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1432
  • Number of comments : 476
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

SteffiTheSmile's page activity

Visits<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:46am<b>cookiees5001</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 10:10pm<b>fragilepackage15</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:50pm<b>biasedshooter</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 9:36am<b>Lanker</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:50am<b>watfordjester</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 6:40am<b>DopeDomo</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 5:53pm<b>sadistmonkey</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 10:05pm<b>gionatorinc</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 11:31am<b>kitcatjb</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:08pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 12:06am<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 9:18am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 1:50am<b>catmom93</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 2:04am<b>runnerj116</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 9:41pm<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 12/07/2013 at 11:42am<b>Dallasluver19</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 12:36pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 6:09am

SteffiTheSmile's FML badges

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of SteffiTheSmile's badges

SteffiTheSmile's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

#3073543
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56673) - you deserved it (15703)

On 06/20/2009 at 10:00pm - intimacy - by anonyme (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, one of my good friends confided in me about the affair she is having with our boss. She'd been sleeping with him for 3 months and told me they were in love, but it had to be kept quiet due to our company's very strict anti-fraternization policy . I'd been secretly seeing him all year. FML

#3060400
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51693) - you deserved it (21443)

On 06/20/2009 at 1:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I was enjoying some much needed serenity while I ate lunch in an empty park. To my surprise, an older, clean cut man in a suit sits on the bench next to me. Without saying a word, he unleashes the most foul of farts I've ever witnessed, gets up, gives me a nod and leaves. FML

#2932416
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72864) - you deserved it (5393)

On 06/16/2009 at 2:15am - misc - by Tim (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I heard my daughter scream at my son through the bathroom door, "Are you jacking off in there or something?" and him scream back at her "Shut up you fucking cunt!" My daughter is 7 and my son is 8. FML

#2772494
819 comments

I agree, your life sucks (119084) - you deserved it (73898)

On 06/10/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by badmom (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend who lives in China contacted me and told me she'd been harassed by a guy and was thinking about pressing charges. The guy is someone I know from college - he promised me he would say "hi" to her for me while he was in Shanghai. FML

#2339786
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50840) - you deserved it (4696)

On 05/27/2009 at 12:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was in the dressing room of my favorite store. While looking in the mirror at a shirt I really like, the fire alarm went off. In a panic, I ran out of the store like everyone else. The sensor went off on my shirt and I was banned from the store for attempted theft. FML

#2009508
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53146) - you deserved it (4191)

On 05/17/2009 at 9:21am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, in order to look nice for a date, I tried the new blue mouthwash that turns plaque blue so you know where to brush. I couldn't get all the blue. FML

#1986687
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17148) - you deserved it (42964)

On 05/16/2009 at 5:19pm - misc - by Ricky (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
342 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36488) - you deserved it (89523)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a lesbian couple walking through the mall. One of the ladies walked up to me in the middle of the busy mall and started screaming at me about how rude it is to stare, and how we are all equal- straight or not. I was only staring because I'm a lesbian too, and they were hot. FML

#774931
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (162959) - you deserved it (26531)

On 04/02/2009 at 10:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I tried having intercourse with my boyfriend, and about 30 seconds in, I heard flipping. He was looking at a porn magazine. "It's to keep my erection" he answered. FML

#653658
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (90273) - you deserved it (8919)

On 03/27/2009 at 11:16pm - intimacy - by VampiresSayRawr (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner, but couldn't eat because he had just gotten his tongue pierced. My grandpa heard this, winked at my boyfriend and said "Can't eat now, but I bet that's all you'll be doing in a few weeks..." My super protective father was sitting right next to him. FML

#572670
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78497) - you deserved it (8781)

On 03/24/2009 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one smallest penis I have ever seen." FML

#273753
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67845) - you deserved it (8574)

On 03/11/2009 at 4:29pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I called my boyfriend crying to tell him I had the most terrible day. He said I should come over, and he would make me feel better. I said I just want to snuggle, and I was impressed with his sincerity. Then he said, "Can we snuggle... with my dick in you?" FML

#121139
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70152) - you deserved it (18358)

On 02/24/2009 at 2:31am - intimacy - by addictedtofml (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was masturbating on my inflatable air mattress that squeaks when you move. Suddenly, my mom busted in my room to ask if I'm okay because she thought the squeaking was my crying. I ripped my hands from my pants and turned on my side; she walked over and grabbed my hands to console me. FML

#70419
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24429) - you deserved it (57376)

On 02/18/2009 at 6:01pm - intimacy - by dirtyhands (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, two girls invited me up to their room at 3 am. As soon as we pressed the up button on the elevator, the fire alarm went off. FML

#6093
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58920) - you deserved it (4777)

On 02/03/2009 at 9:25am - intimacy - by SoClose (man) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: