About Starter : I just realized that my cat owns me... Im on FML whenever he lets me. :D
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Today, a lady threw a coke bottle at my head because she had a non-winning lottery ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19089) - you deserved it (1263)
On 07/15/2012 at 1:51am - work - by kerensa (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20876) - you deserved it (5891)
On 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I walked around town by myself for four hours because I was too ashamed to tell my parents that I have no friends willing to spend time with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21286) - you deserved it (2987)
On 07/12/2012 at 6:31am - misc - by etmerda (woman) - United States
Today, I got a sweet promotion at my job. Instead of being happy and celebrating with me, my boyfriend broke up with me because he is jealous that I'm more successful than he is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21201) - you deserved it (1893)
On 07/11/2012 at 10:40pm - misc - by jenA (woman) - United States
Today, my unemployed mother decided to yet again stay home and drink heavily. So far she's kicked me out of the house, tipped over our sofa and thrown her vibrator out the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18289) - you deserved it (1012)
On 07/10/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by Deadcat101 - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I bumped into a man on the street. I apologized and he picked up his wallet. To clear the awkward silence, I pointed out that his wallet looked like mine. It wasn't until I was on the next street that I realized it was my wallet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17795) - you deserved it (6814)
On 07/07/2012 at 1:01am - misc - by Aaron Lewis - United States (Kansas)
Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51019) - you deserved it (3674)
On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend came to a family barbecue. I guess my dad heard him talking about the "fun" we'd be having later, because over the following two hours, he tripped my boyfriend up on concrete, threw a beer can at him, and sprayed him full-force with a water hose. All "accidentally" of course. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13990) - you deserved it (4689)
On 07/06/2012 at 5:30pm - misc - by :$ (woman) - United States
Today, I sneezed my jaw out of socket. Yes, this is possible. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22695) - you deserved it (1280)
On 07/06/2012 at 11:03am - misc - by hotpatata - United States
Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19778) - you deserved it (2175) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 07/05/2012 at 4:11am - misc - by FauteuilEver Alone (man) - France
Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23179) - you deserved it (2208)
On 07/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by Dreamer (man) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24670) - you deserved it (4183)
On 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by nobrony (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19728) - you deserved it (1356)
On 07/02/2012 at 1:44pm - health - by justhelpful (woman) - Austria (Tirol)
Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML
I agree, your life sucks (19728) - you deserved it (1356)
On 07/02/2012 at 1:44pm - health - by justhelpful (woman) - Austria (Tirol)
Today, I exchanged pictures with a guy I met online, whose devotion to his family really impressed me. In his picture, he was wearing clown makeup, holding a huge knife to his throat with one hand, and an ICP album in the other. All this with a psychopathic grin on his face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13429) - you deserved it (5285)
On 07/01/2012 at 6:57pm - misc - by probablydeadbymidnight (woman) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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