About Starter : I just realized that my cat owns me... Im on FML whenever he lets me. :D
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Today, I realised just how cripplingly self-conscious I am, when I couldn't even fantasise about having sex with a guy without feeling shy and insecure about my body. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19375) - you deserved it (3990)
On 07/26/2012 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by PixiXOXO (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)
Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19544) - you deserved it (1361)
On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19544) - you deserved it (1361)
On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19544) - you deserved it (1361)
On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18453) - you deserved it (11917)
On 07/23/2012 at 3:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I went to my local coffee shop. I soon witnessed the girl making my drink apparently dislodge a wedgie from her ass-crack and then sneeze into her hands. When I confronted her, she loudly accused me of "visually molesting" her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18329) - you deserved it (1332)
On 07/22/2012 at 12:48pm - misc - by bitchimgay (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my sister and I had a huge fight because I flushed the toilet while she was taking a bath. The faucet for the bath was not running, but she insisted that she felt the water in the tub turn "scalding hot." She won't listen when I try to explain to her that it doesn't work like that. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19464) - you deserved it (1153)
On 07/22/2012 at 2:54am - misc - by Raaaaage - United States (California)
Today, while walking home, I passed some guy loudly whining that foreign imports are destroying our economy, and that we should all be deported. When I pointed out that the mobile phone in his hand was clearly a Samsung, he turned bright red and punched me in the gut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15029) - you deserved it (3016)
On 07/20/2012 at 6:45pm - health - by fxck (man) - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)
Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27415) - you deserved it (2082)
On 07/20/2012 at 1:13am - money - by Rachel - United States
Today, I was having a really vivid dream in which I had to take a penalty kick to win the World Cup for the USA. I took the kick, but in reality, I smashed my foot against my bedroom wall and broke four of my toes. I also missed the kick in my dream. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19455) - you deserved it (2061)
On 07/19/2012 at 4:05pm - health - by owwwww - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend picked me up and spun me around like they do in the movies, but not before grimacing, taking a deep breath, and muttering "one, two, three... and... uuuppp!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (14011) - you deserved it (3754)
On 07/16/2012 at 4:51pm - misc - by dogmom (woman) - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my dad sat me down for a talk. After the talk, he wasn't my dad anymore. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32632) - you deserved it (1257)
On 07/15/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, a lady threw a coke bottle at my head because she had a non-winning lottery ticket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19046) - you deserved it (1262)
On 07/15/2012 at 1:51am - work - by kerensa (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I'm still freshly circumcised. My penis is still very sensitive, and I can't squat to grab stuff off the floor because of the pressure against my jeans. Kicking the objects up into my hands was working well, that is until I spilled a pack of 300 toothpicks all over the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19324) - you deserved it (4939)
On 07/13/2012 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I walked around town by myself for four hours because I was too ashamed to tell my parents that I have no friends willing to spend time with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21245) - you deserved it (2985)
On 07/12/2012 at 6:31am - misc - by etmerda (woman) - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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