Starter

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Starter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 20728
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Starter : I just realized that my cat owns me... Im on FML whenever he lets me. :D

Starter's page activity

Visits<b>gkmd98</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 10:37pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:35am<b>lolwutdino</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 4:03am<b>tampabayfan</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 10:51pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 10:31pm<b>rustycage92</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 7:10pm<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 10:07am<b>laniparis</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 4:46pm<b>fueledbyhate</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 6:21am<b>adrianramz69</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 7:01pm<b>lambofgodrules</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 8:41pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 1:06am<b>starfish7</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 6:11am<b>jtthegr8</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 3:14am<b>littlerawr</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 1:36pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 9:07pm<b>stripes97</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:43am<b>cabrillo56</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 4:32am

Starter's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Starter's badges

Starter's favorite FMLs

Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 1:45pm / Australia (Queensland) / Transportation

Today, I lost a bet with my friends. I had to go to the super market and buy a copy of 50 Shades of Grey along with a cucumber. The cashier was trying so hard not to laugh while ringing me up. FML

by Anonymous / 02/21/2013 at 8:43am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML

by pornhastaughtmenothing / 02/21/2013 at 3:46am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I were fooling around in the shower. For some reason, I thought it'd be a good idea to grab his man meat and show him how to wash someone at a nursing home. He said he'd never be turned on by a nurse again. I'm a nurse. FML

by tomedicalforlove / 02/21/2013 at 12:51am / Love

Today, my mom refused to sign me up for a CPR class, reasoning that if I was ever put in a situation where a person was choking, I could save them using my "common sense" and "intellect". I need the class to graduate. FML

by blob / 02/20/2013 at 7:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2013 at 5:55pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I got my results on a recent, important midterm. During the exam, I'd noticed my instructor had accidentally left an answers page in the test packet, so being honest, I didn't look at them. It turns out she did it on purpose to help us pass. I failed. FML

by its ok to cheat!? / 02/20/2013 at 4:52pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I uploaded a new Facebook profile photo, which got over 20 likes in the space of an hour. The most I've ever gotten before was 10. Surprised, I went to check my picture again, only to notice two guys were sarcastically flipping me the bird in the background. FML

by club goer / 02/20/2013 at 2:48pm / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I uploaded the first chapter of my best writing yet to a popular writing website. After ten minutes, I was thrilled to already see one review and five comments. Each comment was telling me to immediately delete the story because of how horrible it was. The rating was half a star. FML

by Apparently not a writer / 02/20/2013 at 11:36am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML

by kryan012 / 02/20/2013 at 8:54am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son asked me if the short films I write are for little kids or for adults. Since I write horror-filled films, I said it was for adults. He went and told his teacher that I made "adult films". FML

by Laila / 02/20/2013 at 7:01am / United States / Kids

Today, the guy I like asked me out for the first time. It's a good thing he did it over Facebook, because I started shaking and almost threw up. I don't know how I'm going to function on our date next week. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2013 at 2:31am / United States / Love

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

by jealouspussy / 02/20/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

by jealouspussy / 02/20/2013 at 1:55am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I've been single for so long my grandmother had to ask if I actually like women or not. FML

by Forever alone Guy / 02/19/2013 at 6:07pm / Australia (Victoria) / Love