Starter

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Starter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 26593
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Starter : I just realized that my cat owns me... Im on FML whenever he lets me. :D

Starter's page activity

Visits<b>gkmd98</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 10:37pm<b>diesel_power</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 1:35am<b>lolwutdino</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 4:03am<b>tampabayfan</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 10:51pm<b>MickiJ</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 10:31pm<b>rustycage92</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 7:10pm<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 02/23/2014 at 10:07am<b>laniparis</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 4:46pm<b>fueledbyhate</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 6:21am<b>adrianramz69</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 7:01pm<b>lambofgodrules</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 8:41pm<b>starfish7</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 6:11am<b>jtthegr8</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 3:14am<b>littlerawr</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 1:36pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 9:07pm<b>stripes97</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:43am<b>cabrillo56</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 4:32am<b>Mommyof2_91</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 2:17pm

Starter's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of Starter's badges

Starter's favorite FMLs

Today, while driving extremely fast on a road in the middle of nowhere, I started to go down a hill. Noticing a police car at the bottom, I slammed my brakes and blew a tire in the process. It turns out the police car was an old cutout used to trick people. FML

by Fox / 02/24/2013 at 10:41pm / United States / Transportation

Today, at my grandpa's funeral, my boyfriend texted me while sitting right beside me, asking if we could have sex when the "family get together" was finally over. FML

by pissed girlfriend / 02/24/2013 at 10:08pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML

by why the fuck would you do that / 02/24/2013 at 9:57pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

by stillfuckingcrying / 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm / Sweden (Kalmar Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was shaving my nether regions, my trimmer slipped and ate a chunk out of my balls, right beside a vein. I've been bleeding on and off for an hour, and the New Skin I tried isn't able to dry quickly enough. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2013 at 2:58pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that the "eyelash curling brush" that my best friend found in my old bathroom drawer was actually a stick used for cleaning food out of my sister's braces. I used that thing for years. FML

by curly_eyelashes / 02/24/2013 at 9:30am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at work, my ex-boyfriend came in. I pretended not to see him, hoping he would just pass on by. No such luck. He stopped to tell me that he was there for orientation. My company hired him. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2013 at 8:56am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was holding the door open for a friend. She told me to wait a second because she had to finish a text. Nearly a minute passed before I asked why she wouldn't come inside to finish typing. We were at a Chinese restaurant. She thought the "No MSG" sign meant you couldn't text inside. FML

by cls_x / 02/24/2013 at 2:53am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my very conservative mom met my girlfriend, who recently shaved her head in support of her best friend, who has cancer. My girlfriend looks beautiful and feminine even with her still very short hair. My mom, however, keeps insisting that I'm dating "a confused transgender". FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 8:42pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, the guy who confessed his love for me also confessed that in his rage, he almost shot the last girl who broke his heart. FML

Today, after supporting my girlfriend for over a year in her endeavour to lose weight, exercise more, and eat better, my now-slender girlfriend dumped me. Because now she find someone better than me. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 3:07am / Australia (Victoria) / Love

Today, my boss told me to go outside and take part in the company's stupid Harlem Shake video. When I declined, he threatened to fire me if I didn't take part. I ended up being the guy who had to furiously pelvic thrust before the music dropped. FML

by mypelvishurts / 02/23/2013 at 2:32am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my brother accidentally hit me in the throat. After I stopped coughing, choking, and feeling like I was going to die, he came back into my room, quietly said "I know your weakness," and left. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2013 at 1:28am / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I was pushing my wheelchair-bound grandpa back home, when a pretty girl walked past us in the opposite direction. He made me stop and turn him around, just so he could ogle her ass as she walked away. FML

by hé merde / 02/22/2013 at 9:27pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I took my driver's test. I did everything flawlessly, but my examiner kept all but pissing his pants throughout. He yelled, "ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!" when I drove past a traffic light just as it was about to turn red. The road was almost empty. He failed me on the spot. FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2013 at 8:47pm / Australia / Transportation