About Starter : I just realized that my cat owns me... Im on FML whenever he lets me. :D
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Today, after a great treadmill run at my gym, I noticed a stain on my clothing. Apparently my nipple chafed so badly that it bled through my white t-shirt, and I'd walked around the gym completely oblivious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20797) - you deserved it (2456)
On 10/03/2011 at 7:19pm - health - by sorenips - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my roommate informed me that one of her scorpions is loose in our apartment again. Great. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25376) - you deserved it (2573)
On 10/03/2011 at 1:58pm - misc - by Username - United States
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32605) - you deserved it (3735)
On 10/01/2011 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by Patricia - United States (Texas)
Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20962) - you deserved it (5505)
On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19836) - you deserved it (2093)
On 09/30/2011 at 2:15pm - misc - by hihaay - United States
Today, my mom instructed me to never scream when being attacked by a rapist. Apparently it would only anger him, causing him to chop my boobs off and superglue my eyes shut. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28887) - you deserved it (2346)
On 09/28/2011 at 2:47am - intimacy - by Sabraynay -
Today, after months of telling my parents I was going to live on my own, I finally moved out. Not even 24 hours being out of their house, some reject burned down the apartment complex I live in. Guess who's moving back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24344) - you deserved it (1586)
On 09/28/2011 at 1:17am - misc - by Foreverathome - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out the reason why my therapist was so nice to me all of the time. Apparently, she is afraid that I'm going to stab her if she pisses me off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18920) - you deserved it (3885)
On 09/27/2011 at 1:14am - health - by Josh - United States (Missouri)
Today, my nephew spent a long while enthusiastically telling me how amazing his new 3D TV system is. I felt his pain as his face turned white when he remembered that I'm blind in one eye since birth. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21865) - you deserved it (1840)
On 09/27/2011 at 12:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
I agree, your life sucks (9376) - you deserved it (21425)
On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)
Today, my fiancé told me his ex-wife was 5 weeks pregnant. I was happy for her, and glad she had finally moved on. Until I found out who the father was. They're moving back in together, for the baby's sake. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30838) - you deserved it (2202)
Today, out of my bedroom window, I can see my next door neighbour's window. On his ledge, I can see binoculars, tissues and vaseline. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35903) - you deserved it (3189)
On 09/24/2011 at 3:22am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I had my car valeted at my hotel. The manager came out, took my keys, and said the car would be waiting for me in an hour. I was then forced to watch from the lobby as the "manager" sped off downtown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17324) - you deserved it (3922)
On 09/23/2011 at 9:48am - misc - by hatty - United Kingdom (East Lothian)
Today, desperate for my boyfriend to notice me for once, I started noisily masturbating while he was playing World of Warcraft. His response was to put his headphones on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31857) - you deserved it (9878)
On 09/23/2011 at 6:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I found out that I have testicular cancer for the second time in two years, and they may end up removing my last testicle. Knowing full well I was also born with an extra rib, the doctor at the consultation joked, "Hey, you'll be three quarters of the way to being a woman." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32821) - you deserved it (1632)
On 09/20/2011 at 7:54pm - health - by Anonymous - United States
Friday 24 May 2013
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