Sporky13

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Sporky13

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4562
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Sporky13's page activity

Visits<b>ralmilk</b> - the 09/03/2013 at 1:33am<b>Knox_Murderz</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 8:54pm<b>0wlcityyyx14</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 11:43am<b>zed34</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 5:05pm<b>musicislyfe22</b> - the 08/12/2013 at 1:36am<b>Faith13</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 7:11pm<b>CaptMurdock</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 2:37pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 10:32pm<b>elphaba1</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 7:27pm<b>hbake</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 5:20pm<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 4:23pm<b>yagurlmb</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 4:16pm<b>WildOshawott</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 8:10pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 7:09am

Sporky13's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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Sporky13's favorite FMLs

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

by why / 08/17/2013 at 10:18am / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML

by Anonymous / 08/17/2013 at 6:52am / United States / Kids

Today, I attended the reading of my grandfather's last will and testament. My parents, as well as my brothers and sister, all inherited a nice sum of money. I got 69 cents, because "young Jack always was an immature little shit." FML

by JacksWag4 / 08/16/2013 at 6:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Money

Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML

by that's methed up, darling / 08/16/2013 at 5:33pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I gave my daughter the sex talk. Barely 10 minutes later, her public Facebook status read: "My mom's a total pedo." and after she mentioned the talk, her friend posted, "That's sexual harassment. You can sue for that." Clearly I've failed as a parent. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2013 at 5:05pm / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, I was verbally abused by a customer at my job. Apparently, wearing "ugly, thick-framed hipster glasses as a fashion statement is a HUGE faux pas." These are my actual prescription glasses, and "faux pas" is not pronounced "fox paws". FML

by hipster glasses / 08/16/2013 at 7:08am / United States / Work

Today, I received a text saying, "I don't think we should be friends anymore. You're terribly depressing and you make everyone unhappy" followed by, "Oops, wrong person!" and then by, "Sorry, it really is for you". FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2013 at 12:24am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad, under threats of disowning me, insisted that I offer my sister a job in my company. I run my own law firm, she is a hairdresser. FML

by lawman / 08/15/2013 at 9:34am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Work

Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML

by bglenney / 08/15/2013 at 5:47am / United States (California) / Work

Today, I went to a store. I was wearing a shirt that I'd bought from the very same store, and was accused of stealing. When I tried explaining, the manager said I was lying because I'm a teenager and "all teenagers are full of shit." FML

Today, my sister admitted to selling pages of my diary to my old boyfriends. FML

by sisterly love / 08/14/2013 at 5:13pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, a guest of the private beach club I work at asked if I could do something about the water temperature in the ocean. I laughed, thinking it was a joke. She was serious and complained to my boss, saying I was absolutely no help. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2013 at 3:47pm / United States / Work

Today, was my wedding day. We had a beautiful outdoor wedding and everything was going perfectly as planned. That is, until a bird flew over us and left a present right between my boobs. I had to stand at the altar for 30 minutes as bird poop melted in my cleavage. FML

by NewBride / 08/14/2013 at 1:39pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend's family, and he was saying how well his driving lessons are going. During this conversation his mum told him to "stop blowing your own trumpet." He replied, "If I could do that, I wouldn't need Anna." His dad gave him a high-five. FML

by NoMoreTrumpetBlowing / 08/14/2013 at 12:22pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy