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Spins's favorite FMLs
by kenzamee / 03/04/2014 at 9:39am / United States (Oregon) / Work
by drunkenloser / 09/20/2013 at 3:22am / United States / Health
Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML
by benjo / 08/06/2013 at 2:07pm / United States / Kids
by Bonding_boys / 12/17/2012 at 11:21am / United States (Minnesota) / Kids
by ChevRooon / 01/26/2012 at 11:46pm / United States / Transportation
by Anonymous / 09/13/2011 at 1:53am / United States / Miscellaneous
by 613tanner / 05/19/2011 at 1:30am / Transportation
by Grrrr! / 04/23/2011 at 10:19am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by Michelle / 04/26/2010 at 5:42pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Health
Today, I went ice skating for my friend's birthday. We had to vacate the skating rink so that they could smooth out the rink for the next session. I don't know how to skate and my friends left me. Not only was I the last one out of the rink, but I had to crawl my way out with everyone laughing. FML
by elmangy / 08/11/2009 at 12:58pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to the grocery store. My checker was very hot. When it came time for me to pay, I swiped my debit card and the machine kept rejecting it. Sure that I had money in my account, I did it again, before the cute checker informed me that I was swiping my driver's license, not my debit. FML
by flustered / 07/28/2009 at 6:55pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/09/2009 at 12:27pm / France (Midi-Pyrenees) / Miscellaneous
Today, my first graders released the butterflies we've been raising. The kids were sad that one had died in his cocoon and wouldn't be set free. Turns out that butterfly may have had a better fate: a flock of birds ate half of the others. Immediately after releasing them. In front of the kids. FML
by Anonymous / 04/29/2009 at 12:30pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friend's apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML
by nic / 04/01/2009 at 4:06pm / United States (Virginia) / Health
- Today, I was mowing the lawn. I hadn't mowed it in awhile so I didn't realise the rock that was in… Today, my boyfriend dumped me. One reason was because he couldn't have "intellectual conversations"… Today, I asked my husband of 15 years to get a vasectomy, as he's said for the past 13 we are done…