Spider

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Offline (the 07/21/2016 at 2:18pm)

Spider

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 11 June 1982 (34 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 63124
  • Number of comments : 65
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

About Spider : in relationship, full time employed, generally happy

Spider's page activity

Visits<b>bisousmaddie</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 7:00am<b>tigershark44</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 8:14pm<b>faerieonacid</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 7:07am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 10:23pm<b>hugoni2000</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 8:45am<b>stormrunner987</b> - the 12/09/2015 at 3:29pm<b>jonloran</b> - the 10/24/2015 at 4:53am<b>puppie406</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 12:18am<b>Nail9797</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 2:33pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 8:22pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 4:10pm<b>somethingstupd</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 1:19pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:16am<b>nityasomaiya</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 6:22am<b>roxzanne22</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 7:02pm<b>bryce0110</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 2:09pm<b>KushTreats</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 12:43am<b>jayyvonblood</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 1:47am

Spider's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Spider's badges

Spider's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was getting into work, I saw a co-worker of mine walking in front of me. We're really good friends and we joke around a lot, so I jokingly whistled at him and slapped his butt. Turns out it wasn't my friend, it was the new guy. Hello, sexual harassment charges. FML

by introuble / 08/23/2009 at 12:48am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, after my partner of two years broke up with me, I decided to have a heart to heart with my mother about it. Her advice was to clean the house. I asked how that would make me feel better. She said that she wasn't sure, but at least the house would be clean. FML

by Loveless / 08/22/2009 at 8:43pm / United States (West Virginia) / Love

Today, my husband came home from shopping with my 4 year old daughter and showed me a shirt she picked out herself. The shirt read "My mom's easy i'm living proof." Apparently she just liked the colours and her father agreed. FML

by naughtyshirt / 08/22/2009 at 5:29am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, I found out that just because your boyfriend asks you to marry him doesn't mean that he will show up at the wedding. FML

by Loveless / 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I got all my co-workers motivated. We were all going to quit and walk out the door. I went first. I gave an emotional speech to my boss and threw my uniform to the ground. Then I turned around to to see the rest follow, they all began laughing. They didn't. They WANTED me to quit. FML

by ineedanewjob / 04/08/2009 at 8:34pm / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML

by intranator / 04/08/2009 at 5:43pm / Jordan (Amman Governorate) / Love

Today, my girlfriend told me that she had an ultrasound tomorrow morning. With a confused look on my face, she said to me "don't worry, it's not yours." FML

by Crazy09 / 04/08/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

by StevieMe / 04/08/2009 at 10:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML

by thatwasmiz / 04/08/2009 at 2:38am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I asked her if she could put some sunscreen on my back. Thinking it would be funny, she used the lotion to write "I Love Little Boys". I work as a children's swimming instructor. FML

by Anonymous / 04/08/2009 at 12:03am / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I saw the blueprints for my family's new house. My room is half the size of the room next to it. The room next to it is my step mom's walk-in closet. FML

by Powerfool / 04/07/2009 at 6:07am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally gave the guy I was with for over a year a blowjob. Right after he tells me "I don't want a girlfriend but I want you to be my best friend." FML

by LALALA3 / 02/16/2009 at 6:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I finally gave the guy I was with for over a year a blowjob. Right after he tells me "I don't want a girlfriend but I want you to be my best friend." FML

by LALALA3 / 02/16/2009 at 6:20pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML

by pineapple456 / 02/16/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I was hooking up with a girl in my apartment when I told her I didn't have a condom. She started laughing and upon realizing my look of confusion, said "Oh, you actually thought I was going to have sex with you?" FML

by pineapple456 / 02/16/2009 at 4:09pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy