About Spartancjm : Hello there.
If I somehow interested you through my picture maybe even a genius (or flat out retarded) comment, then I should tell you about myself.
I'm a guitar player and play rock/hard rock/metal
My favorite music is hard rock and metal
I love to read fantasy books
I play video games, particularly RPGs and others
I don't have a favorite band.
Message me if you want, love talking about faith/music/FANTASY/games B)
About Spartancjm : Hello there.
Spartancjm's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Spartancjm's favorite FMLs
Today, I woke up to noises in my living room. I was scared, but I loaded my gun and snuck downstairs. I burst into the living room, yelled for the motherfucker robbing me to put his hands up, and flicked on the light. My cat stared back at me like I was a moron then calmly walked out. FML
by Anonymous / 10/24/2015 at 10:47pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
by Anonymous / 10/24/2015 at 10:33pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/24/2015 at 12:41pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals
by iAlissa / 10/24/2015 at 2:12am / United States / Love
Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML
by Embarrassed ass. / 10/23/2015 at 12:05am / United States (Oregon) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/22/2015 at 3:02pm / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/20/2015 at 5:44am / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend about the importance of foreplay, and that attempting to get me "in the mood" by whipping his cock out and air humping was roughly equivalent to throwing a dry teabag at me and claiming he made a cup of tea. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2015 at 11:05am / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Intimacy
Today, I laughed about a fold in my girlfriend's jeans that felt like she had a tiny boner. She started crying. Turns out she has a slight deformity. Oops. Explains why we've been taking it so slow. FML
by Anonymous / 10/16/2015 at 4:39am / Australia / Love
Today, my girlfriend and I were trying to get it on on the bed. As soon as things were starting to get heated, I turned over and saw that my dog had not only jumped up on the bed, but had been watching and started to hump the pillow next to our heads. FML
by GiveADogABone / 10/15/2015 at 6:47pm / United States / Intimacy
by what did I do? / 10/15/2015 at 3:30pm / United States (California) / Love
by btoker / 10/15/2015 at 12:16pm / United States (New York) / Love
by laurenmichela / 10/12/2015 at 5:47pm / United Kingdom / Health
by Anonymous / 10/11/2015 at 9:25am / United States (Indiana) / Love
- Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give… Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating… Today, my dad and I got royally bitched out by my mother, because she found a bill for a porn site…
- Today, I live in Romania and my walls are particularly thin. After enduring my neighbor’s parties,… Today, I threw up when I got home because I'd been drinking with friends. My parents asked what was… Today, I travelled in a shared taxi on the winding roads of the Peruvian Andes. The guy next to me…