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Sparkleaf

Offline (the 05/13/2015 at 9:10pm) | Search for a member

Sparkleaf

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 8317
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Sparkleaf's page activity

Visits<b>acetl87</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 1:03pm<b>venus89</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 7:51pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 8:08pm<b>LivingLouder</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 11:10pm<b>blakeyboy22</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 4:06pm<b>klovemachine</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:56am<b>LaLince</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 12:13am<b>MyCommentsSuck</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 1:30pm<b>tialeanne</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 2:33pm<b>turkturkington</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 6:02pm<b>lilhellian</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 4:58pm<b>oomph</b> - the 12/03/2012 at 3:33am

Sparkleaf's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of Sparkleaf's badges

Sparkleaf's favorite FMLs

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

#21040159
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45999) - you deserved it (9462)

On 01/25/2014 at 11:29pm - kids - by mom - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to explain to my father that when my friends sleep over, it's not acceptable to sneak into my room in the middle of the night and dig through their stuff. FML

#21039686
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49588) - you deserved it (4011)

On 01/25/2014 at 3:34pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in revenge for being grounded for bullying a kid at school, my eight-year-old son flung a handful of Lego in my path as I walked barefoot into the kitchen. I'm still in pain. 5ML

#21038562
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43186) - you deserved it (8485)

On 01/24/2014 at 6:10pm - kids - by limping (man) - Canada

Today, I noticed my laptop kept shutting down and the mouse cursor was all over the place, clicking on every folder. I dismantled the entire computer only to notice something in one of my USB drives: the receiver to a wireless mouse my colleague put there earlier to play a prank on me. 5ML

#21037915
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36751) - you deserved it (7826)

On 01/24/2014 at 2:16am - work - by Kenny (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, and for the past week, my dog started barking at my door when I start masturbating. I think my mom is starting to suspect. FML

#21037288
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44281) - you deserved it (9970)

On 01/23/2014 at 4:06pm - intimacy - by fappy dog - United States (Illinois)

Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML

#21036979
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43447) - you deserved it (14947)

On 01/23/2014 at 7:53am - misc - by MarBlu - United States

Today, I learned that my girlfriend can sleepwalk. She got up, came into the living room where I was laying back against the sofa playing video games. I wasn't really paying much attention, until she stepped on my crotch, after which she left. She doesn't remember a thing. FML

#21035414
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44029) - you deserved it (5867)

On 01/21/2014 at 7:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, my girlfriend told me the reason why my credit card mysteriously maxed out 2 months ago 'might have been' because she posted a picture of it on Facebook. I ordered a new credit card without the custom picture of us immediately. She broke up with me. FML

#21035364
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53243) - you deserved it (5846)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:59pm - love - by FacebookStrikesAgain (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, my plans for having sex with my girlfriend were thwarted for the sixth time in a row by my own mother. I found out later that she's been reading my texts so she knew when to drop by and ruin everything. FML

#21035329
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51630) - you deserved it (10169)

On 01/21/2014 at 6:26pm - intimacy - by MM - United States (Maine)

Today, I had a big final project due for class. None of my project partners would help me yesterday, because they were convinced we'd have a snow day. Unfortunately, we didn't have a snow day, and we failed. FML

Today, my brother asked me if I wanted to see a magic trick. I stupidly said yes and now have a black eye from where he punched me. My dad thinks it's hilarious and my mum says he didn't know any better. He's 13. FML

#21035253
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44409) - you deserved it (5661)

On 01/21/2014 at 5:27pm - health - by cuntocracy (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time. Her normally very sweet cat now hisses and savages me if I so much as look at him. FML

#21034982
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43011) - you deserved it (7075)

On 01/21/2014 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by idiot says pussy (man) - United States

Today, I was in a market in France, and went to ask the seller for some potatoes. I speak fluent French, but I got flustered and instead of saying "pomme de terre", which is the French for potato, I said "pomme de merde". I literally asked for an "apple of shit". FML

Today, I noticed that the condom in my wallet has been there so long it's left a mark. FML

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. After a while, he started staring at my lady parts, and said my "vag looks like a mockingjay". He then stretched the lips apart like wings and made little "CA-CAW CA-CAW!" sounds. FML

#21033383
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58618) - you deserved it (9422)

On 01/19/2014 at 10:59pm - intimacy - by Goodyear (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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