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Sparkleaf

Offline (the 11/11/2014 at 6:40am) | Search for a member

Sparkleaf

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4660
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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Sparkleaf's page activity

Visits<b>acetl87</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 1:03pm<b>venus89</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 7:51pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 8:08pm<b>LivingLouder</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 11:10pm<b>blakeyboy22</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 4:06pm<b>klovemachine</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:56am<b>LaLince</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 12:13am<b>MyCommentsSuck</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 1:30pm<b>tialeanne</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 2:33pm<b>turkturkington</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 6:02pm<b>lilhellian</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 4:58pm<b>oomph</b> - the 12/03/2012 at 3:33am

Sparkleaf's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of Sparkleaf's badges

Sparkleaf's favorite FMLs

Today, my 7-year-old daughter made a new game: hitting me in the groin when I'm not expecting it. She hunts me in the house, hides around corners, and behind furniture to ambush me. She'll even do it if she catches me napping. I'm a grown man living in fear of a little girl. FML

#21029770
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51687) - you deserved it (11579)

On 01/16/2014 at 12:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband and I decided to have a quickie before the kids woke up from their nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children came busting in with their nerf guns, screaming, "Where's the monster?" FML

#21025946
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53546) - you deserved it (32464)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I tried to lose my virginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. FML

#21020996
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59601) - you deserved it (25846)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today, my son was playing The Sims, when I saw him remove the door to a room and set it on fire with a Sim trapped inside. I chuckled at first, until I saw that the Sim was me. Meanwhile, my wife's Sim was happily painting in the next room, not giving a crap. All too accurate, sadly. FML

#21015673
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46198) - you deserved it (4963)

On 01/03/2014 at 4:50pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I got to spend all of my time scrubbing poop off the walls and carpet because my 2-year-old decided he wanted to 'paint mama a picture.' FML

Today, I was babysitting my barely-pubescent cousins, and they started talking about giving blowjobs to their "boyfriends". When I got mad at them and told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff, they said I was just pissed 'cause I haven't gotten laid. FML

#20984257
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48466) - you deserved it (4536)

On 12/07/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by bella - United States (Texas)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter got mad at me for not buying her yet another expensive doll. I had to pull her away, and she started screaming for help. The next thing I know, another shopper puts me in a chokehold and calls for security, all while my daughter smirks. FML

#20983816
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48171) - you deserved it (5627)

On 12/07/2013 at 12:29pm - kids - by john doe (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my husband learned that if he asks me a question while I am dead asleep my answer will most likely be "Yes". Incidentally, I now have a new cat. FML

Today, I had a dream that I was playing fetch with my dog. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't woken up to the sound of my phone smashing against the wall. FML

Today, a customer threatened to come back later and shoot the whole place up. Why? I didn't give him a discount on his beer. My boss's reaction when I called the police: "Why didn't you give him the discount?!" Last week he bitched me out for letting a girl off for being a few cents short on hers. FML

#20983086
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40551) - you deserved it (2874)

On 12/06/2013 at 6:37pm - work - by eat my fucking ass, boss (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

#20982965
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51002) - you deserved it (5323)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML

#20982787
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36960) - you deserved it (2657)

On 12/06/2013 at 1:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, my friend's dog got hit by a car. I was the only one not in shock, and had to drag the poor thing off the road, then comfort a hysterical friend while the driver verbally abused us and demanded we pay for the repairs to his car. FML

Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML

#20982547
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40326) - you deserved it (2967)

On 12/06/2013 at 4:36am - misc - by unlucky neighbors - China (Shanghai)

Today, I dropped a $400 bottle of wine while trying to get the cork out. FML

#20982484
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42262) - you deserved it (16205)

On 12/06/2013 at 2:08am - money - by butterfingers - United States (Pennsylvania)



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