Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Sparkleaf

Offline (the 10/17/2014 at 5:43pm) | Search for a member

Sparkleaf

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4004
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Sparkleaf's page activity

Visits<b>acetl87</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 1:03pm<b>venus89</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 7:51pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 8:08pm<b>LivingLouder</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 11:10pm<b>blakeyboy22</b> - the 03/24/2013 at 4:06pm<b>klovemachine</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:56am<b>LaLince</b> - the 01/25/2013 at 12:13am<b>MyCommentsSuck</b> - the 01/05/2013 at 1:30pm<b>tialeanne</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 2:33pm<b>turkturkington</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 6:02pm<b>lilhellian</b> - the 12/14/2012 at 4:58pm<b>oomph</b> - the 12/03/2012 at 3:33am

Sparkleaf's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of Sparkleaf's badges

Sparkleaf's favorite FMLs

Today, after months of looking at cribs and picking out the perfect one for my unborn daughter, the store informed me that they no longer make that crib, even though the model is right there on the sales floor. I had to leave as my hormones got the best of me and I started bawling. FML

Today, after years of insomnia and going to doctors to help get a regular sleeping pattern, I finally fell asleep without the help of medication, only to dream about being chased by an angry seal and singing to Rihanna with a horse. This is probably why I don't sleep. FML

#21049132
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41081) - you deserved it (3811)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:29am - health - by Sleepless (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, as usual, I stress ate. After having my exams prolonged for an extra week, I ate three extremely large packs of Skittles, and then threw them all up. Taste the rainbow, puke the rainbow. FML

#21048665
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38164) - you deserved it (14228)

On 02/02/2014 at 10:26pm - health - by Sad Student - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my sister what she thought of my boyfriend. She said, "He's nice. Deserves better than you, really." FML

#21048143
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42465) - you deserved it (5758)

On 02/02/2014 at 1:39pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was bitched out at 2am by my parents, for trying to "sneak out." I was sneaking out of my bedroom to take a crap. FML

#21048094
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41106) - you deserved it (3581)

On 02/02/2014 at 12:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I finally received the last check from my insurance company after my house flooded 10 months ago. Tonight my house flooded again. FML

#21047933
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46659) - you deserved it (3919)

On 02/02/2014 at 6:32am - love - by itwasalongnight -

Today, while in the prison I work at, I came down with severe digestion issues. Master control probably laughed as they watched me wait at the security gates in a cold sweat, squeezing my ass-cheeks together like an inmate smuggling contraband. FML

#21047394
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39021) - you deserved it (3991)

On 02/01/2014 at 5:42pm - work - by TwistedCherub1 (woman) - United States

Today, I've been without hot water for three days thanks to a frozen water line. I finally managed to thaw the frozen area, only to have the chunk of ice dislodge, slam into a bend in the pipe, and burst the line. FML

#21046497
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37283) - you deserved it (5526)

On 01/31/2014 at 7:40pm - misc - by IceQueen - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML

#21046394
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43194) - you deserved it (8213)

On 01/31/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I finally finished making my daughter's wedding cake. When I checked on it later, I found a large slice had been cut out. I soon found out that my husband had instagrammed himself eating it, with the caption "#guiltypleasures". FML

#21046154
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47049) - you deserved it (4011)

On 01/31/2014 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, me and my boyfriend were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cock blocked me. FML

#21045897
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47376) - you deserved it (7024)

On 01/31/2014 at 1:16am - intimacy - by CatBlock (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was sitting on the couch, watching The Avengers with my 4-year-old daughter, who loves the Hulk. When Hulk finally showed up, she excitedly looked at me and screamed, "Hulk Smash" before slamming both of her fists into my balls. FML

#21044971
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49784) - you deserved it (6240)

On 01/30/2014 at 7:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend finally succeeded in unhooking my bra with one hand, excitedly exclaiming, "Boobies be free!" FML

#21043704
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42647) - you deserved it (10973)

On 01/29/2014 at 12:13am - love - by freed - United States (Ohio)

Today, my daughter hugged me around the neck and whispered, "I'm going to cut your head off." I'm afraid to go to sleep now. FML

#21043189
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43191) - you deserved it (5292)

On 01/28/2014 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Bahrain (Al Manamah)

Today, I moved back into my dorm. My ex-girlfriend, and the guy she left me for, now cohabit next door. Now I get to hear them screwing while I try to do my homework. FML

#21043113
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49044) - you deserved it (3899)

On 01/28/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by Order of the Dangling Testicles (man) - United States (New York)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: