Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Spanky08

Search for a member

Spanky08

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 15 February 1983 (31 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1074
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Spanky08's page activity

Visits<b>Eire17</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 4:55pm

Spanky08's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Spanky08's favorite FMLs

Today, I got on an elevator at the mall, along with a twelve or thirteen-year-old girl talking on her cell. She spent the whole ride telling the person on the other end how hideous I looked and how I look like a pregnant sperm whale. I was too humiliated to even say anything. FML

#20001108
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29088) - you deserved it (4320)

On 08/03/2012 at 9:52pm - kids - by pimpslaprequired (man) - United States

Today, I cleaned the toilet so vigorously that I snapped the handle of the brush. I laughed and told the rest of my family. Instead of joining in on the hilarity, my mother screamed, "We have had that toilet brush for twenty-six years!" FML

#19995981
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26000) - you deserved it (2529)

On 08/01/2012 at 3:59am - misc - by SLAB_GIRL15 - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I tried to explain to my daughter why she couldn’t have a sleepover with her boyfriend yet. She said, "If you're so worried about me having sex, then you failed as a father because I've already banged four guys." FML

#19995628
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56635) - you deserved it (10361)

On 08/01/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, a girl told me she couldn't text me anymore, because she was too tired and had to sleep. Over the next three hours, she updated her Facebook and Twitter accounts, and made a YouTube video of herself singing. FML

#19994423
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26659) - you deserved it (5526)

On 07/31/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

#19993573
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14360) - you deserved it (37839)

On 07/30/2012 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I woke up to find my cat has gone into heat. Her favorite thing to do right now is sticking her ass in my face and howling like a Nazgûl. FML

#19992743
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19550) - you deserved it (4012)

On 07/30/2012 at 2:05pm - animals - by soph511 (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26165) - you deserved it (12408)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was in line at the pharmacy when the man in front of me asked if I wanted to see a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. Before I had time to answer, he showed me a picture of a turd that looked like an uncircumcised penis. FML

#19981127
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25165) - you deserved it (2014)

On 07/24/2012 at 5:51am - misc - by Uncircumcised Penis - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house when we noticed her cat was missing. We saw it on the roof and so I thought I would try to look good by offering to go on the roof to retrieve it. The cat had climbed down when I got up there, and I have a fear of heights. Her mom had to help me down. FML

#19980789
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10622) - you deserved it (20084)

On 07/24/2012 at 1:10am - animals - by screw the cat (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, was my daughter's birthday. I didn't know I had a daughter. FML

#19980298
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26051) - you deserved it (10839)

On 07/23/2012 at 8:52pm - kids - by nick (man) - United States (California)

Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet animal slither down my leg. I started shrieking loudly and dancing dementedly to get it off, and everyone in the restaurant turned to stare. Then I realized there was a hole in my pocket and some quarters had slid out down my leg. FML

#19979543
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19251) - you deserved it (7142)

On 07/23/2012 at 11:41am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I mowed over a bird while mowing the lawn. It wasn't dead, so I had to mow over it a second time to put it out of its misery. Now there are pieces of dead bird all over my lawn and I can't sleep. FML

#19979145
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24469) - you deserved it (17223)

On 07/23/2012 at 3:35am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was swimming in my pool with my two sons. A few hours later while on Facebook, I saw that one of them had liked a photo with the caption, "Peeing in a pool, best feeling ever." FML

#19978741
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20668) - you deserved it (2354)

On 07/23/2012 at 12:28am - kids - by poolboy -

Today, I finally realized how depressed I am when I found bubble wrap and didn't feel like popping it. FML

#19957944
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31464) - you deserved it (2515)

On 07/19/2012 at 5:01am - health - by Epiphany (man) - United States



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: