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Spanky08's favorite FMLs
by nomegusta / 01/05/2013 at 10:59am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, during dinner, my mum asked why I've been so upset recently, so I just admitted it was because my girlfriend had cheated on me. At some point during my venting, I asked why this stuff always seems to happen to me. My dad looked up from his plate and said, "Probably karma." FML
by moronforadad / 01/04/2013 at 9:04pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous
by bureaucratic assfuckery / 01/04/2013 at 3:51pm / United States (Maryland) / Health
Today, my dog died. We planned to get her cremated and keep the ashes. My sister put forward the idea of putting the ashes in our food so our dog can be "inside of us, always." She's completely serious. I'm scared to eat food from her now. FML
by Anon. / 01/02/2013 at 4:53pm / Animals
Today, I overheard my mother telling my sister that she expects my marriage to fall apart any day now. Apparently, I have no concept of what "marriage" really means. My husband and I just celebrated our 7th anniversary, while my mother is planning her 5th wedding. FML
by alynna007 / 01/02/2013 at 5:31am / United States (Washington) / Love
by ashbeat / 01/01/2013 at 10:20am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by aelia_oups / 12/31/2012 at 5:09pm / Miscellaneous
by awkward. / 12/29/2012 at 10:50am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love
by Amathiel / 12/29/2012 at 10:23am / Norway (Sogn og Fjordane) / Health
by nosleep / 12/29/2012 at 2:33am / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by almostkilledmyself / 12/29/2012 at 2:30am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML
by Anonymous / 12/28/2012 at 10:14am / Canada (Quebec) / Love
by kmtranter / 12/28/2012 at 6:40am / United Kingdom (Brent) / Intimacy
Today, a girl mistook me for her boyfriend and broke up with me because I'm "a liar and a cheating bastard." I've never seen her in my life, but I'm so lonely that I tried to convince her to give me another chance and stay with me. FML
by Alone / 12/28/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Love
Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML
by Bouh / 12/26/2012 at 11:04pm / Love