SpRiTzSpLaSh

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SpRiTzSpLaSh

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14923
  • Number of comments : 105
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SpRiTzSpLaSh : It's because of my affliction, isn't it?

SpRiTzSpLaSh's page activity

Visits<b>totallydone</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 3:14am<b>magnetic_aura</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 12:10am<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 7:40pm<b>lp102400</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 8:44pm<b>pete9913</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 12:23pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/06/2014 at 11:58pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 7:12am<b>lmc94</b> - the 10/21/2012 at 4:53pm<b>devil_laugh</b> - the 05/29/2012 at 6:57pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 02/02/2012 at 3:59pm<b>Tistheseason</b> - the 02/02/2012 at 11:16am<b>Tvolsfan325</b> - the 01/21/2012 at 6:48pm<b>bri5083</b> - the 01/20/2012 at 10:41pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 01/19/2012 at 5:04pm<b>flashxprt</b> - the 01/15/2012 at 11:55pm<b>perdix</b> - the 01/15/2012 at 10:18pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:36pm<b>jren207</b> - the 07/31/2011 at 7:06pm

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SpRiTzSpLaSh's favorite FMLs

Today, I am defending a client on trial for perjury. She is a sweet girl and the first person I've loved in years, but she keeps doing everything she can to make herself look guilty in front of the jury. Now I'm having a daily crisis of conscience in the middle of the courtroom. FML

by chieftain / 05/09/2012 at 3:34pm / Norway (Vestfold) / Love

Today, I corrected someone who spelled "learned" as "learnt" on my favorite forum. Nothing could've prepared me for the torrent of abuse that followed from the non-American members. Now I'm banned for "trolling," and all my 7,000+ posts since 2006 are gone forever. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2012 at 6:10pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I brought my girlfriend home while my parents were at work, and things got a little heated. We lost track of time, because the next thing we knew, my dad burst into the living room. He doubled over laughing and asked how much I paid her. FML

by mal / 05/08/2012 at 4:46pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Intimacy

Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML

by coffeeshopgirl / 05/07/2012 at 8:25pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, while showering with my boyfriend, he asked if something was weird about his penis. Naturally, I looked closer. As soon as I did, he sprayed my face with urine. This is only the beginning; we just moved in. FML

by quirrus / 05/07/2012 at 5:42am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I went with my boyfriend to the optometrist for him to buy contact lenses for the first time. He said the detail was much better than glasses. I excitedly asked him if he could see my freckles better now, and after a long and disappointed look at my face, he said "Nope, just more acne." FML

by Anonymous / 05/06/2012 at 12:41am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I came home from the minimum-wage job I suffer through to support my now ex-boyfriend's ailing music career. It seems his time management skills suck almost as badly as his music, because I found him in my bedroom, licking whipped cream off my step-sister. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2012 at 12:28pm / United States (Arkansas) / Love

Today, I got tasered by a cop. It was his second day on the job. My crime? Sneezing during a sobriety test. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2012 at 7:44am / United States / Health

Today, feeling desperate, I asked my dad for advice on how to get a girl. He asked me why I want to even date. I panicked and said I just wanted to make someone happy. He told me that if I wanted to make someone happy, I should "just start by getting a goddamn vasectomy". FML

by AnonymousUser / 05/04/2012 at 8:01pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I was petting my cat and I jokingly said out loud, "Oh, the pussy likes it rough? You like that, don't you?" My windows were open and I could hear the neighbors laughing. FML

by anonymous4991 / 05/03/2012 at 8:39pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while I was sneaking a boy out of my room at 2am, I ran into my mom sneaking a man into her room. FML

by dentistrygirl / 05/03/2012 at 3:41pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Health

Today, I had a date with the girl I've been interested in for months. I'm pretty laid-back and casual with my friends, which backfired and caused the date to end with a slap, when I greeted her with a friendly "S'up, slut?" FML

by f*ck / 05/02/2012 at 12:22pm / United States / Love

Today, I had to ring up our local competitors to get prices for paint. I pretended I'd just bought a house and was doing it up, and I actually got excited about doing up a make-believe house. FML

by tillyg15 / 05/02/2012 at 7:18am / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Work

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

by Flip / 05/02/2012 at 1:06am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love