About SousapCody : I'm just here to laugh and have fun.
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SousapCody's favorite FMLs
Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML
by whaaaaat111 / 03/09/2013 at 7:04am / United States (Virginia) / Money
by Quiteannoyed / 03/09/2013 at 5:35am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Love
Today, during a sleepover at my friend's house, I woke up in the middle of the night with a dire need to pee. As I walked in the dark to the bathroom, I saw a silhouette in a doorway and instictively screamed. Turns out it was my friend's sister's One Direction cutout. FML
by Neversleepingthereagain / 02/28/2013 at 2:00pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML
by vagina dentata for christmas, pls / 01/25/2013 at 1:51pm / United States / Love
by anonymous / 09/05/2012 at 12:44am / Australia / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. Right as she orgasmed, she screamed out Megatron's name. When I later confronted her about this, she said that she always had a crush on him and wanted to be queen of the Decepticons. I've been dating this lunatic for a year and half now. FML
by Loserbot / 09/03/2012 at 9:02pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I had a piano exam. My friend noticed how nervous I was, and recommended that I compliment the examiner for higher marks. When it was time for the exam, without thinking, I told him I liked his hair. Turns out bald people don't like that. FML
by p / 08/28/2012 at 4:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 08/28/2012 at 12:29am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/30/2012 at 11:36pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Awkward / 07/18/2012 at 10:15pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by moodyreallyrocks / 07/08/2012 at 8:30pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, I was assigned to work on a huge project with Michael. Michael refers to himself in the third person, constantly mumbles unintelligibly to himself, doesn't smile, laugh or make eye contact, and refuses to address me directly. I'll be stuck with him for about four months. FML
by NoMagicMike / 06/27/2012 at 12:53pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work
Today, I was told off for not holding the door open for a woman behind me at work. Yesterday I was informed that chivalry is offensive to women, as it implies that they are not equal to men. I can't win. FML
by JohnBlack / 06/11/2012 at 11:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by rj / 05/12/2012 at 10:42am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
by Turnipseed3 / 05/03/2012 at 1:00pm / United States / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…