SoulAmeliorate

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Offline (the 02/04/2015 at 4:22am)

SoulAmeliorate

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1575
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About SoulAmeliorate : If I'm not online, I'm probably out getting Headlight Fluid.

SoulAmeliorate's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/18/2016 at 12:46am<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 11:41am<b>happysmile987</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 5:23am<b>SingingWolf</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 2:46am<b>OMGitsMikkel</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Hildy93</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 1:29am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:58pm<b>AlliTheKat</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 4:02pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:17am<b>mattatom17</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 4:00pm<b>footballguy55</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 3:04pm<b>manateesarecool</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 11:09am<b>EpicGuy70</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 7:58am<b>southernbelle28</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 8:37pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 02/14/2014 at 2:44am<b>SkipBeatOtaku</b> - the 02/09/2014 at 12:53pm<b>elmatador615</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 1:17am<b>Straya_for_life</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 8:00pm

Fucked!<b>HowlingFire</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 6:16pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 3:27pm

SoulAmeliorate's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of SoulAmeliorate's badges

SoulAmeliorate's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad watched his first Lord of the Rings marathon. Now he keeps spouting lines from the movies, and thought it'd be funny to hide in my closet, just to jump out at me screaming, "My precious!" FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 6:36pm / United Kingdom (Thurrock) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a text message while driving home. I checked after arriving, and found it was a kinky text from my boyfriend, so I sent him an even kinkier reply. He later raged at me, because I somehow should have known he was showing off his phone to his mom when I sent my reply. FML

by i'm not psychic, mother fucker / 06/02/2013 at 4:48pm / Sweden (Uppsala Lan) / Intimacy

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

by fuckshitcockwaffle / 05/31/2013 at 10:59am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

by Anonymous / 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I was torn from my car and slammed against the hood because a canister of window-cleaning wipes I keep in my glove compartment apparently looks vaguely like a pipe-bomb. My lawyer agreed with the cops, and won't handle the "excessive force" case I threatened the police with. FML

by JDziewaltowski / 05/24/2013 at 3:42am / United States / Transportation

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I e-mailed the on-line instructor for my job, telling her that I had fallen behind in my work due to my grandmother's passing and the subsequent funeral arrangements, but that I would catch up this week. Her reply? "OK. Hope your grandmother gets better soon." FML

by projectfain / 05/22/2013 at 8:28am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbors called the police and said that they saw, through the window, a suspicious person in my house doing something to my piano. The "suspicious person" was me, in my own house, playing my own piano. FML

by pianoplayer / 05/21/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got a picture message from my aunt that said, "9 out of 10 kids get their awesomeness from their aunt." Normally, I would have agreed, except she forgot my birthday yesterday. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2013 at 3:32am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2013 at 11:56am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML

by violatedbuttcrack / 05/16/2013 at 6:24am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth filled. The nurse just finished taking my info when the doctor came in and started drilling. Through my chorus of screams he realized he'd forgotten to numb me. His only response was, "Guess I forgot to numb ya, huh?" while giggling. FML

by toothache / 05/14/2013 at 8:03am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I got a breast exam. I'd never had one before, but assumed it would be quick and easy. I had no idea how ticklish my boobs are. I burst out in uncontrollable laughter and kept instinctively jerking away. FML

by Anonymous / 05/08/2013 at 2:42am / United States / Health