Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Somber

Search for a member

Somber

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 15680
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Somber's page activity

Visits<b>iqbaleh</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 6:31am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:30pm<b>soccerchic64life</b> - the 07/15/2009 at 9:34pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 06/30/2009 at 2:00am<b>APrincess11</b> - the 05/23/2009 at 6:57pm<b>maximum31337</b> - the 05/04/2009 at 8:31am<b>username666</b> - the 04/27/2009 at 5:19pm<b>poopooface</b> - the 04/25/2009 at 7:47pm<b>Hazygoose</b> - the 04/08/2009 at 10:35pm<b>leyalu</b> - the 04/08/2009 at 4:04am<b>timemaster666666</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 6:10pm<b>deathbybutterfly</b> - the 04/07/2009 at 5:55pm<b>BeanieBaby</b> - the 04/01/2009 at 7:31pm

Somber's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Somber's favorite FMLs

Today, I was waiting in the lobby of a modeling agency for my interview to be a potential model and I was next in line. They called "NEXT!" and I walked in with a smile on my face. They stared at my face for a moment and then started yelling "NEXT". FML

#922187
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52281) - you deserved it (9974)

On 04/12/2009 at 3:00am - misc - by taptheturtle (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while lying next to me, my boyfriend smiled and told me, "I really like your eyes. They're pretty." He paused and then finished with, "They really help your face." FML

#901241
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50800) - you deserved it (3588)

On 04/10/2009 at 1:13pm - love - by ruvru - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was fooling around with someone I had met at a club, in my room. It got really heated, and I was really getting into this guy, until he lifts up my leg and asks "Can I lick your leg?" FML

#898181
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54205) - you deserved it (21952)

On 04/10/2009 at 5:43am - intimacy - by cherry (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my fiancé's parents visited. I keep chickens for their eggs, and his parents own a farm, so we had a connection. They told us to leave the house while they cooked us dinner. When we returned, we faced two steaming plates of chicken. My chickens. They had names. FML

#896114
412 comments

I agree, your life sucks (223583) - you deserved it (27746)

On 04/10/2009 at 1:11am - animals - by lanbon182 - United States (California)

Today, I told my ex boyfriend I lost 20 lbs because of the stress of the break up. His response was "you're welcome." FML

#889567
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50447) - you deserved it (25519)

On 04/09/2009 at 6:11pm - misc - by blutownie13 - United States

Today, at lunch I was running to my group's table with my friend. She accidentally tripped me, and I slid across the café floor face first on my belly. The whole cafeteria was silent. They then broke out in hysterics when the head janitor ran up to me and yelled 'SAFE!' like a baseball umpire. FML

#877965
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66520) - you deserved it (11193)

On 04/08/2009 at 9:42pm - misc - by eun (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML

#869850
346 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37139) - you deserved it (90497)

On 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by blizzard_of_77 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a date with this girl I met online. The conversation drifted and we were talking about how we'd prefer to die, if we had a choice. I said, "I want to skydive over the ocean without a parachute." She said she wants to be made into a wallet. FML

#849037
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55328) - you deserved it (8881)

On 04/07/2009 at 3:08am - love - by no_leather_of_any_kind - United States (Oregon)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
930 comments

I agree, your life sucks (355243) - you deserved it (38854)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mom was helping me clean out stuff from college. She opened a box and took out some anal beads I got as a gag gift. She asked, "What are these?" I answered, "They are for massaging your back". She then insisted I show her. I massaged my mother with anal beads. FML

#300638
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31535) - you deserved it (65270)

On 03/13/2009 at 9:48am - intimacy - by DanniRae (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

#278783
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52392) - you deserved it (98260)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by SpiderMan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. I minimized the porn on my laptop so she wouldn't see I was watching it. It turns out I was watching an old Beatles concert before I started masturbating. My mom thought I was masturbating to the Beatles. FML

#267368
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24271) - you deserved it (75658)

On 03/11/2009 at 12:42am - intimacy - by theassman (man) - United States (Missouri)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: