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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
Today, when I walked up to my car, all my windows were smashed. Thankfully, all I keep in my car is jumper cables, a pen, my car insurance and manual. Whoever smashed my windows apparently was pissed, 'cos they left a note saying "F**k you and your f**king station wagon". FML
I agree, your life sucks (22534) - you deserved it (1614)
On 11/15/2009 at 6:16pm - misc - by Smashed (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, after visiting my mom, she stuffed a bunch of pads in my backpack so I'd have some at my dorm. When I was going through security, I was stopped and ended up missing my flight. Apparently the jumbo pads my mom sent look exactly like packs of cocaine when they go through the X-ray machine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23338) - you deserved it (1698)
On 11/09/2009 at 1:42pm - misc - by tampondealer (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25113) - you deserved it (2377)
On 11/08/2009 at 2:26am - animals - by birdbath (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
I agree, your life sucks (25421) - you deserved it (3307)
On 11/05/2009 at 12:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, while at the store, my fly became undone. It doesn't seem that bad unless an old lady comes to "zip it up for you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25976) - you deserved it (3241)
On 10/25/2009 at 2:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)
Today, I realized that sometimes I forget to turn off my desk light when I leave the room for dinner. I also learned that said desk light can get hot enough to melt plastic, which is why my brand-new laptop screen was literally oozing onto the table top when I got back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22991) - you deserved it (8040)
On 10/22/2009 at 5:00pm - misc - by iplaytwister (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I started feeling sick to my stomach. I tried to soothe it with some Ramen, which helped for a while. Later on, I felt worse and threw up the soup. Noodles came out of my nose. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26141) - you deserved it (5144)
On 10/21/2009 at 12:40pm - health - by Rayvyn (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my mum started yelling at me for leaving scissors on my desk, which my five year old sister found and chopped all her hair off. She had a lump of hair as proof. After three minutes of her yelling, me crying and apologizing, she laughed and said she was joking. She just cut my sister's hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36450) - you deserved it (3587)
On 10/18/2009 at 11:27am - kids - by hairdresser (woman) - Thailand (Krung Thep)
Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6484) - you deserved it (89654)
On 10/13/2009 at 2:54am - love - by PanFace (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I learned that if you're going to tell your mother you are gay, make sure she isn't holding a frying pan filled with hot grease. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49967) - you deserved it (1462)
On 09/28/2009 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I had a restraining order put on me. I have apparently been following a woman's daughter home after she leaves track practice and parking my car outside their home. I'm a math teacher at the school and leave everyday at 4:30. I have lived across the street for the past six years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41555) - you deserved it (1502)
On 09/27/2009 at 1:24pm - misc - by stalker (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found my two best friends making out with each other. Not a big deal, right? Wrong. Today was my wedding day. One of the friends was my maid of honor, the other was my groom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59721) - you deserved it (2986)
On 09/25/2009 at 1:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went on a date with a new guy after not dating for quite some time. I'd drank a lot of water, so I wouldn't eat so much on the date and look like a pig. Unfortunately, I'd forgotten how funny this guy really was. He made me laugh so hard, I peed all over myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13295) - you deserved it (32271)
On 09/25/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by MessedXUp (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I went on a date with a new guy after not dating for quite some time. I'd drank a lot of water, so I wouldn't eat so much on the date and look like a pig. Unfortunately, I'd forgotten how funny this guy really was. He made me laugh so hard, I peed all over myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13295) - you deserved it (32271)
On 09/25/2009 at 12:43pm - love - by MessedXUp (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was home alone, and decided to do some naked cleaning just because I could. After half an hour of liberating nakie-dusting, I turn around to see my boyfriend and his best friend gaping at me open mouthed. His older brother however gave a creepy smile and the thumbs up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11243) - you deserved it (30183)
On 09/23/2009 at 5:35am - misc - by DusterOverBits (woman) - United Kingdom
Monday 20 May 2013
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